Uh, hello? Is this thing on?

I feel like I should write out Adele's lyrics to "Hello". I think this is the longest gap of time I've had between posts. Would you believe me if I told you that I've thought about this blog at least a couple times a week? But when I would eventually get a pocket of time, I just didn't feel like writing. I thought of various things I wanted to be sure to write down so I wouldn't forget. But then, wouldn't you know, I forgot what they were. But it never occurred to me to just let this go and walk away. I'm stubborn that way. Right there, I can of so much I want to write about. I want to start writing personal letters to The Bun and The Bean so they can read it later and know what their mama was thinking ... and that maybe she really isn't that cray-cray. She just has a lot to think about that they didn't know about. I want to maybe even write letters to The Man but that's a little more sensitive because, well, those are very personal thoughts that most likely have to deal with conflict or relationship complexities. Essentially, not all cupcakes and roses:p I want to write about what my one word is for 2016, when I chose it, and how I'm going to use it to reframe my thoughts and actions so I can be a better self, wife, mama, daughter, sister, friend, professional and overall human being. I want to write about how my daughter wrote me a beautiful note with misspellings but so much wiser beyond her years, how it gave me pause and how it was a wakeup call that I was not doing things as well as I thought I was. And, shockingly enough, although it was something I have been fixated on for years, it was sort of an almost afterthought it this rambling of things I want to make sure to write about - I finally, finally reached my weight goal. How it happened and how I feel now. I must say that even though it was the last thing I thought about it when it came to things I want to write about in my blog, this was incredibly hard, and even though I am by no means a skinny minny (I will always be curvy unless I get very ill), I feel healthy and good, inside and out. Guess I should get started writing, right? Well, the 30 minutes that I took to write this has now eaten into my morning schedule and I'm now a half hour behind in getting myself, The Bun and The Bean ready. I'll leave you (well, really ME b/c this blog is read by only me) w/ two things that have captured perfectly what I struggle with on a daily basis. I know I'm not the only one but I can only speak for myself. There's a video of Jada Pinkett Smith that has gone viral b/c she talks about the challenges of finding balance in taking care and being responsible for herself, her husband and her children as well as fulfilling her dreams while helping her children and husband fulfill their dreams. It is a very good video and what she said spoke to me. http://omeleto.com/219456/ It also reminded me of an interview that really resonated w/ me regarding a woman CEO saying women can't have it all. And that you have to cope, know you are doing your best, or you will die of guilt. So I thought I would repost that article, in case anyone else, man or woman, struggles with balance. When I posted it on FB, some of my friends thought it was depressing. I found it to be the opposite. It made me feel that if this incredibly intelligent and successful woman is struggling, I don't feel so terrible about struggling with this, too. http://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2014/07/why-pepsico-ceo-indra-k-nooyi-cant-have-it-all/373750/