I'd like to say that I feel like I'm at the home stretch. That I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. But I don't. Right now I'm thinking, "Holy $%&*, I have TEN more weeks left. TEN!"
I've been told numerously that I'm really blessed to have what is considered a good pregnancy. Only got a little sick the first trimester and, knock on wood and everything else, haven't run into complications. And yes, comparatively, especially to those who have had to be on bed rest, I'm sure my pregnancy has been stellar. And, by golly, if these ten weeks are what it takes for Sticky Bun to grow and develop properly, I'm on board 100%. But that doesn't mean I'm not going to bitch about it.
Because, dammit, I am tired of being pregnant. I'm pretty sure I'm getting bigger by the minute. After all, isn't she? But it's becoming impossible to sleep without waking up at least three times a night. Usually, it's more. Even maternity pants are no longer comfortable. I swear my boobs can now feed a village of babies. My shoe selection is now limited to flip flops. And the skin across my chest and tummy is ITCHY and tight. (Yes, I've faithfully smothered myself w/ shea butter. Back off.) Oh, and I'm a tiny bit more irritable. I'm thinking the itching, lack of sleep, uncomfortable weight gain and hormones have all contributed to this.
I know it's all going to be worth it. I know that if I think I'm in love with this baby now, this baby I haven't even seen yet, I'm going to be head over heels in love when I meet her. I know that almost all the negative thoughts I've had these 10 months (did you know it's actually ten months of pregnancy?!) will pretty much disappear as soon as I hold her ... which explains how moms can have more than one child. I know that I will love and be devoted to this little girl for as long as I breathe.
But wow, I am still on board on trying to figure out how we can have babies like hens have chicks.
As for the labor ...
The Man and I are meeting with our doula this week. I feel really good about my decision and am glad that The Man has been supportive. I've learned that when I am uncharted territory, I am comforted when I do my research and am arm myself with knowledge if I can't have the experience (yet.) Like I told my husband, I'm looking forward to the birth of Sticky Bun the way I looked forward to my 21st birthday. I know it's going to be a monumental occasion in my life and something I will remember forever. I also know that with all the joy I will be experiencing with The Man to bring Sticky Bun into this world, it is going to hurt like a MOTHER EFFER.
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