Exactly one year ago

The Man knocked my socks off and surprised me with a wedding proposal.
I'm going to share a little secret. Well, obviously it's no longer a secret if I'm posting it on the world wide web. Anyway, a little over a year ago, I found out that The Man had bought my engagement ring. But I had no idea when he was going to propose. And no, he didn't know I knew and I'm not going to say how I knew. Because I cannot reveal my sources.
Had I seen it? No.
Did I know if it was even in the house? No.
And while it was wonderful to know 100% that he was serious about taking our relationship to the next level, this was also The Man who took over six months to ask me out. He had an infinite amount of what I had very little of ... patience. And can sometimes move as quickly as stagnant water. But who am I to judge.
I had no idea when he was going to propose. I figured he would hold on to it at least until my birthday, Christmas or even Valentine's Day because then he could get two events in one gift. Hey, I wouldn't have blamed him, it's the kind of gift you want to try and make stretch.
Because I am me, I had to share this huge secret that had to do with me. I told the one person who would understand and not judge my impatience - my Sister. I did NOT want to shout it from the roof tops. And that's because if it took as long as I thought it was going to take or if it never happened at all for some freak reason, I didn't want to feel stupid. That is why, around this time last year, one could find comments on our blogs or some of the messages on our myspace pages where my sister and I made repeated references to pants.
"What's the scoop on the pants?"
The pants are on back order. I think."
"How big are the pants?"
"The pants will probably need to be hemmed."
"Have your pants come in yet?"
"I have no idea when the pants will come in. Probably in time for New Year's."
"GD pants are taking forever."

Yes, Pants was code word for Engagement Ring.
I thought we were so clever because there we were, openly discussing this huge thing, this potentially life changing event, casually over the Internet.
I wrote a pretty detailed description of how The Man proposed to me so I won't reinvent the wheel. I will, though, repeat that he did a wonderful job taking me by surprise and I would have never guessed in a million years that he was going to propose that day. It was a Monday, for crying out loud! When I told him that I thought he was going to hang on to the ring for months before he would propose, he surprised me even more by telling me he had had the ring for less than a week.

Just when you think you know someone, he goes and pleasantly surprises you.
Eight months later, we had a truly beautiful wedding in Hawaii and a fantastic honeymoon. And a year later we are happy little newlyweds and six years (total) strong. Oh! And, as of last Tuesday, I am officially Mrs. Ramirez with not just the Social Security Office but also the Department of Motor Vehicles. What a pain in MY ass it was to change my name with the government. But it just goes to show how much I love him. And when I was at the DMV on Tuesday, I was told after I signed all the paperwork, "Get in line over there to take your picture." I must have had a puzzled look on my face because the DMV guy said, "New name, new picture."
Damn. So I had to take a new picture. Heaven help me when I finally get my driver's license in the mail.
But I do love The Man with all my heart so, yes, it was all worth it.

A lazy blogger, I do make

Things haven't been terribly busy, I've just been lazy. I'm back to my regular routine for the most part. I can't seem to form paragraphs in my head (go 11 years of public education!!) so I'll just write by topic.
Does it feel any different: Yup, still getting asked this question! And while our day to day lives are still the same, you know what? It is a little different. I have a whole new feeling of contentment. And now he's a little more worried, at times. Like he realized that he didn't know exactly where I went when I go to yoga and knitting. He had an idea but he didn't know the address. He said recently, "You know, maybe you should write down your schedule somewhere, with addresses. What if you go missing and I call the police and I have no idea where to tell them to look?" Valid point but something he never worried about before. It's sweet. Of course, one could be negative and think, 'You didn't give a crap when I was you girlfriend??' Luckily, that's not me:)
Career: If you followed the depressing saga that was my last job, you know that I was miserable. I think that experience has helped me, though, to realize what I want, what I'll put up with and what will make my walk out the door. My current job is challenging, sometimes difficult and every so often a pain in my ass. But I still I love my job. At the last place, unfortunately, I had doubts within the first two months. I have been with my current company for over a year and still love it.
I have an expected 35% growth from last fiscal year and have exceeded everybody's expectations. My territory has done better than what my boss and colleagues (and me!) thought it would do. Of course I work very hard. But with my position, things can still blow up in my face and go down the pooper. So I am very happy - and relieved - by how I will end this fiscal year. What was kind of a cool thing is that my supervisor's boss, a senior VP, recently asked to be one of three presenters at our training academy this summer! I'm a bit nervous because I don't like telling people what they should do or what I think will make them successful, especially to folks who have been in the position longer than me. I suppose it's all in the delivery. But I'm excited that I was asked! It's not all sunshine and roses, believe me. But it's really good. Of course, the little sunshine squasher in me is thinking, 'You've got to do the same thing all over again in July!' That makes me shudder a little. But I push those thoughts away.
Working out: Oh boy, if there is one thing I've let go of is this task! Two months out prior to the wedding, I was doing cardio 3x a week, power yoga 2x a week and weight resistance 3x a week. Can you believe that?! And if you did the math, no I'm not exaggerating and putting in an eight day week. I would do cardio before vinyasa yoga. I woke up at 4:50am to be at the gym by 5:45am!!! Now I'm sure there are some gym buffs out there who go much earlier or do much more. But for me, for MY standards, I was kicking my own ass. I lost a total of 7 lbs and while I didn't hit my goal, I was happy to have gotten to that point.
And then there's me POST wedding. Ah hmm, well .... let's just say that I need to self motivate because I'm getting a little too comfortable. I knew that I couldn't keep up the crazy schedule prior to the wedding. I mean, I could but realistically, I knew I wouldn't. So the new routine is to do cardio 2x a week, yoga 2x a week and strength training 2x a week. Riiiiight ... last week I did everything just once. And "Yayy me!" for going to the gym. But I have to admit that I'm disappointed in myself. I can do better. I can BE better. So this is something I have to work on.
Baby: So guess whaaaat?! Just kidding :) I love The Man. He has changed so much in the way he communicates to satisfy his wife's needs. Umm, I'm positive there are delusional men out there who think, 'She has two degrees in communication but she won't expect ME to communicate.' Idiots. Anyway, we broached the baby topic while on our honeymoon. Actually, it was me looking around our beautiful surroundings while we were laying out and I started to worry. How can we do this if we have a baby? How can we afford this? How can we enjoy this if we can afford to bring baby with us? Do I want to bring baby with us??
Oh yes, not a melt down but a little bit of a freak out. So I asked him, "Hon, how can we go on vacations like this if we have a baby?" He said, "We can't." And then I said, "Remember how I wanted to try next year? Well, I'd like to push it back. I want to go on a few more mini moons with you before we have a baby." He said that he wanted us to be financially stable, have a home and a few more things before we have a child so it was fine by him. Thank goodness we are on the same page! Of course, because I have a naughty sense of humor, every so often I'll hug him and whisper, "Let's forget about what we talked about and have a baby." He'll pretend to push me away and say, "Stop that! Are you taking your pill?" Hehehe. My sister knows that I am also waiting (and hoping!) that my maternal instincts will kick in in the next couple of years. Luckily the puppies have been good yet gentle training.
So that's all I can think of for now. I desperately want to go on another vacation - Hawaii or Mexico (I've been hearing great things about the all-inclusive resorts!) But we have to wait a little bit, let our bank accounts recuperate and all that good stuff. I'm happy that I have no more of the post vacation blues, though! Just enjoying being with The Man, the puppies and my every day life. I'm a very happy woman.

THE video

We finally have our wedding video! This was the last piece we were waiting from our photography/videography company and we were so excited to finally receive it. I've been kind of a lazy blogger ... I want to write about our honeymoon because it was our first time in Kauai (and at a five star resort!) but The Man keeps making videos so it's just easier to post those. Of course THIS video is from our videographer. He separated into three parts – highlights, ceremony, and interviews. I won't post the footage from the ceremony because it's about ten minutes long and it's embarrassing for The Man and me to watch. The first clip is highlights from the entire wedding. The whole sha-bang in four minutes – I love that :) The second clip, the interviews, may be interesting to just family members. We asked that people tape messages to us. We had quite a few shy people in the bunch, my parents included, but the folks who did get on the video were really sweet. Be warned, my friends affectionately used the words, "VJJ" and "poon" .. and I didn't expect anything less. (Yes, these were the women I used to say exchange inappropriate words with on a daily basis.) Jon was a little confused on how they used these words. He had thought he understand what they meant but then they used it them in a completely different context. I had to explain that not only are they synonyms for lady parts and replacements for curse words but also terms of endearment. Hehe. Anyway, all messages were all touching and The Man's mom at the end was probably the only one who almost made me cry. About that - the slideshow, the photographs and even the video didn't make me shed a tear. The only reason I can think of is that although I am usually a weeper, the self-conscious side of me was stronger. I couldn't help notice how I sounded, when my make up got smeared, and the unflattering shots where I looked chubbier ... so no crying for me! I'm just a harsh critic of myself which, I think, prevents me from getting completely mushy over anything. Despite that, I have to admit that I am over the moon about everything our photographers and videographer gave us and I am so happy we chose them to document such an important day in our lives. I think The Man looks absolutely handsome and I am just beaming with happiness and love. See? Mushy :)

Wedding highlights:


Interviews:


**Please let me know if it's difficult to view footage on vimeo. The Man likes it because it's a whole lot clearer than YouTube but I don't know if it's a pain to view things. 5/25/08 update: I've gone ahead and changed to YouTube. I can't be having stuff cut out at the end! :P

The Man's on a roll ...

he's gone and made a couple more videos of our wedding and honeymoon. What's great about posting it on this blog is that you can choose to to view them rather than us sitting you in front of our TV and making you watch. All the while watching you watch them so you have to then pretend you are captivated. If you want to see them - great. If not, we'll never know :) They aren't nearly as crazy as the "Death March Monday" video but if you've got some time ... check them out.
The first one is highlights of our honeymoon and has an upbeat tone. The Man, for whatever reason, chose a Michael Jackson song. Cracked me up. Then the second is a little more sappy (his words, not mine.) I think it's sweet but it may be a bit slow for anyone that wasn't there. Or just doesn't care. Unless you're emotionally invested, it just may not mean as much. Anyway, here you go!

Gil and LizaDawn's Honeymoon snippet from Gram on Vimeo.


More of the honeymoon from Gram on Vimeo.

Let's go back to the wedding reception for a minute ...

My sister gave a very sweet and touching Matron of Honor speech. She is a very good public speaker (even though she will protest and say she isn't) so she committed her speech to memory. The brother-in-law wrote his speech down but wasn't able to print it out - he was having problems with the hotel's business center and it wouldn't work. Just like The Man, his brother finished the speech the day of the wedding so that was probably why he was pressed for time. But, luckily, he DID write it down ... so I can share it with you :)

Best man speech
Hello. First of all, thank you to everyone who helped this special occasion possible and thank you to all the friends and family for being present here today.
For all of for those of you who couldn’t tell by our uncanny resemblance, I am Gil’s younger, better looking brother, Marvin.
Umm to be honest, I’m terribly nervous and I’m horrible at making speeches. Today I considered bailing out instead of making this speech. Then, I thought to myself: “You know what you need Marvin. You need courage. The courage that firefighters posses to run into a burning building or the same courage it takes to marry the likes of my brother, Gil. “I’d like this moment to thank LizaDawn. Who will forever be a source of inspiration for the meek in our hour of despair. You will continue to have a tremendous influence in our daily struggles. We thank you.
Now for a poem. This isn’t an ordinary poem as it lacks any fundamentals of poetry like iambic pentameter, grammar and other pointless things.
To Gil, my little flower has finally blossomed. My, have you grown so much. Your petals seem to touch the sky signifying your passage beyond your insecurities and inadequacies proving that you no longer need alcohol to get women into bed. With this union you assured me that you are a heterosexual. Believe me, I had my doubts but I think the security guards at the gym might need a bit more convincing before they allow you back into the men’s locker room. Well now’s your chance Gil. Bloom, my little flower, bloom.
On a more serious note, Gil and LizaDawn do make beautiful couple. Being single and, yes, I am single, I hope to find a friendship and love as rare as these two share. I wish them all the best. Your happiness is our happiness. You had better remember this as my mouth will never utter such sappiness again.
To finish I’d like to welcome LizaDawn to the family, as now she is the prettiest one in the family… second to me, of course.

Leisurely hike, my @ss

The Man wanted to do several adventurous things while we were on vacation. No problem, I said. Kayaking, ziplining and ATV - sounds like fun. "Oh hon," my new husband said, "I'd like to go on an adventure trail but it's all day. Don't worry, the book says it's easy. Takes an hour and a half to get to and it's faster going back down the mountain."
Evidently, easy is subjective. I should have raised more questions when I saw we were packing 128 oz of water, a compass and snacks. Also keep in mind that I am very clear about my likes and dislikes. More power to you if you enjoy camping. I do not. I am much better at beaches and regional parks – places that the city or county are in charge of maintaining. I am not good in the wilderness. By wilderness, I mean the jungle.
After four hours of hiking, we were at the secret tunnel. We couldn't go through and continue, though, because it was going to be dark in a couple of hours and we needed to be done before then or else we would be in complete darkness. I broke down crying three times. I mean, all out, hyperventilating sobs. I'm not proud, it was what it was. I was exhausted, cold, wet, muddy and had fallen numerous times. It got to the point where I was scared of everything because I was falling left and right. To be fair to The Man, the book did mark this trail as easy. And the book also said it would be muddy for only the first 150 yards. It was muddy the ENTIRE TIME. I wore sneakers but lost traction from all the mud gathered in the treads. And sometimes I lost my sneakers in the mud. But we finished in 6 1/2 hours. We made it back to the car right after sunset so there was still a little light left.
Honestly, I hated this hike. I prefer nicely paved or packed trails ... like Diamond Head. I was so tired but this was really important to him and something that he wanted us to do so, by golly, I wasn’t going to quit. We were going to find that damn tunnel! And with the help of his compass, going on wrong trails that lead us back to where we started and running into poor strangers who bought the same guidebook as us, we finally found that ugly tunnel. The Man felt bad that I was bruised, bitten and scratched (and hating life!) so I got a spa treatment the next day ... on him!
Anyway, The Man documented our hike and made a video. Unfortunately, there was no way I could hike and hold the camera so there's no footage of him :( But I told him within the first 10 minutes, I would have slipped and smashed his camera against a rock so it was for the best. You will see from his editing that he has a kooky sense of humor. Yes, I love my husband.


Death March Monday HD from Gram on Vimeo.

PS: At the end, he mentioned that I couldn't sleep that night. It's true! I kept dreaming that I was falling, slipping or tripping. My body would jerk and I would gasp, "Honey! I fell!" And he laughed and said I was dreaming. This happened at least four times during the night.

The day we tied the knot

I'm going to just post our DOLs and not describe the day because I could never do it justice ... at least, in my eyes. I loved every moment of it and couldn't have asked for a better wedding ceremony and reception.
I had written my declaration of love a while back because I didn't want to have to worry about it as the day drew closer. The Man used a different approach and finished writing it the night before. But you'll find that mine cracks a lot of jokes while his was pretty deep. He worried that it would be too sappy and didn't really like it. He had no idea that he would have many of my female relatives in tears! He didn't make me cry but it wasn't a bad thing. We have good communication in our relationship but rarely are we completely serious with each other. So all those pictures of me smiling are actually because of his declaration of love - it was very different and special from how we usually talk to one another. (The one time I cried during the ceremony was when my declaration because a little more serious - that's what I get for showing my softer side!) Anyway, I will post mine first and then his because I think his is better :)

My Filipino Matt Damon, happy six year anniversary. What better way to celebrate than getting hitched? I think I’ve been pretty good about making sure you know you are loved. And I do love you very much for so many reasons. I love you for your sense of humor. You make me laugh so much. I always tell you that I wish I wrote down the funny things we say to each other because we always seem to forget. But I always remember that you make me smile. For instance, you make me laugh because you can never remember more than five words to any song and all the melodies sound exactly the same. Yet somehow I can usually guess what song your singing. Also, your imitation of Korean, Japanese, Mexican and Australian accents get muddled into one indistinct accent. How? I don’t know. But they do. What’s even funnier is that your imitations of Filipino and Indian accents are even worse – they sound exactly the same. I also think the voices you give to Piko and Pili are funny. Thank you for letting me know in their own words that they are neglected by me. These are just a few of the many things you do that make me laugh.
I love you because you are patient. For example, goodness knows that you and I clash when it comes to home repair. That’s what I get for being involved with someone who is so handy around the house. It’s a blessing because it’s so wonderful to be with someone who can repair things, build things or make things better. It’s a curse because I don’t remember ever signing up for an apprenticeship. Which brings me back to you being patient. I know you expect only as much as you expect from yourself. But what you get from me, especially regarding home repairs, is far from perfection. But I give you credit! I see the vein bulging in your forehead. I see your brows furrowed in frustration, but then, with a strain your voice, you just tell me yet again that I need to watch how you paint a door so I can copy your method to ensure there are no streaks. Which leads me to another reason why I love you …
You know how to compromise. I no longer have to do home repair because I am in charge of cleaning the house. I can’t begin to tell you how much I love you for that! I love you because you are comforting. When I am sick, you either buy or rent a romantic comedy because you knew they made me feel better. Even though you don’t enjoy them nearly as much as I do. When I was having a really hard time with work, you would make me hug a puppy because you said it would make me feel better. It did! And when you know I am feeling really down, you would make me drop everything and go to the beach. Going to the beach almost always cheer me up. Other times, it was just your company that would soothe me and make me feel better.
What you may not know, because we joke around so much and are very sarcastic with each other is how much admiration I have for you. You are a wonderful person. I admire your values, morals, intelligence and overall character. You are amazing. You have so much goodness in you and you continue to amaze me. You are so devoted to your family and loved ones. And that has even carried over to my family. You probably don’t know this but when you show concern for my parents’ well being or worried about something in their home, I see how you share your love and concern for those who are so very important to me. And that inspires me. You make me want to be a better person. I see how you express your goodness through your actions and you make me want to strive to be just as an amazing person as you are. I think you are truly an exceptional person. There are not enough words to express just how much I am in love with you. I have loved the six years we have been together and I look forward to the 100 more years of joking, laughing and loving. And no home repair.
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I still remember the first time you and I met at a friends house. You walked in and I thought you looked so much different from anyone else. A few minutes after arriving, you told this funny story about a cockroach in a way that only you could. Your eyes lit up, your hands danced in the air while you talked and your body shook with laughter and excitement. That cockroach story did it for me. You had this personality that really drew me to you and I had hoped that I’d run into you again. When we eventually began our relationship, we would talk all night long about everything and anything. I looked forward to knowing everything about you because we had so many things in common. We made sure to make time for one another every day. Each night, you wanted me to give you a new and different reason that I loved you. So every day it became a tradition that I end every nightly conversation with “I love you because”.
I love you because you’re my best friend. I love you because you make me a better person. I love you because you believe in me more than I believe in myself. I love you because you know how to comfort me if I start to turn green with anger. I love you because you’ll never let us walk without holding hands. I love you because you’ll never let us go to bed angry. I love you because talking to you makes a bad day feel O.K. I love you because it makes me laugh when you can’t stop yourself from eating chocolate. I love you because you’re beautiful, hardworking, intelligent and driven. I love you because you’re still humble, modest and reserved. I love you because you accept all my faults and compliment all my strengths. I love you because you still look at me the way you did when we first started dating. I love you because I can always trust you. I love you because I can depend on you to constantly remind me to do things that I may be putting off. I love you because we can laugh at so many things together. I love you because you take of and respect your family. I love you because sometimes you slip and talk to me like I’m one of your girlfriends but I know you do that because you’re so comfortable with me. I love you because you are willing to get your hands dirty with me even though I know you’d rather be knitting. I love you because you are the first to forgive, the first to want to communicate and the last to hold a grudge. I love you because I have so many reasons to love you, to appreciate you and to be thankful for you. I look forward to spending the rest of my life with you, sharing my thoughts with you, caring for you, protecting you, laughing with you, appreciating you, having kids with you and growing old with you.

Day before the wedding & a shout out to The Man

Tuesday morning we decided to have a welcome breakfast to replace the normal rehearsal dinner. I had a couple of reasons for this. One, we were having a luncheon reception for our wedding so I didn't want the rehearsal dinner to be nicer or more formal that that. And two, it was less expensive. Well, scratch that. We were able to offer more food at the same price if we went with breakfast. And because I know my family, as with most Filipinos, they were very happy because it was a breakfast BUFFET.
Ahhh-yahhhhhhh.
Just kidding. I mean, not about the buffet because it was actually quite nice! Of course, I'm bias. Maybe my sister or cousin can give a review ;) The Welcome Breakfast was at the Palm Terrace restaurant located in the Turtle Bay Resort. The food was quite yummy with the selection of fresh tropical fruit, french toast, bacon, omelets ... all the good stuff. We have 29 guests that day because a few were either flying in that day or had already planned to do something else but it was still a pretty good turn out. For many of them, it was the first time they had been at the resort and they really enjoyed the scenery.
I wish we had been better about fluttering from table to table and conversing. But we weren't. The Man is shy and I'm much better in a small group setting than a large one. Oh well, I don't think our families minded ... at least I hope they didn't! We made sure we at least greeted everyone and thanked them for coming. We just weren't able to hold conversations with every person and I kind of regret that. They all chowed down and thanked us for hosting the breakfast so we figured people were happy!
After the breakfast we had our rehearsal. It was interesting because we were doing it without our reverend, hotel coordinator and the ceremony location. The reverend said that he didn't think we would need him due to it being such a small wedding. Plus, because it was on North Shore, he would have to charge us a travel fee of $100, I think. OK - never mind that. And our coordinator wasn't joining us because it would cost us $150.00 to have her one hour. And we were rehearsing outside of the Pavilion and not in it because it would cost $600 to rent it for the rehearsal. Can you imagine? $850.00 just to rehearse for a 15 minute ceremony. Goodness! I asked my two friends to lead us and walk us through the motions and if they thought anything looked unusual or awkward, they could change it.
You would think it would be easy to get people to gather in the lobby when we all just had breakfast together. It was like herding cats, people. My two friends, my sister, my mom and dad, his mom, and his brother ... good lawd, I thought we were never going to start! Someone had to go to the bathroom, then another, then my dad wanted to go to the bathroom ... up in his hotel room! When we finally got it together to do the run through, most of my relatives stuck around to watch us. And as my sister mentioned, many of them were wondering why I was going to have my wedding outside of the Pavilion rather than in it (we didn't take the time to explain so I'm sure it was a pleasant surprise for them when they saw the next day that the wedding was being held inside, after all!) I remember I thought it was really cute how my dad wasn't sure about the process of giving my hand. "Kiss your cheek, shake Jon's hand and then give your hand to him? Or kiss your cheek, give your hand and then shake Jon's hand with my other hand?" Who knew the process was a bit complicated? I was even forgetting to kiss him before he gave my hand ... such small details that can end up making a difference! After several tries, and much input from my friends and the crowd, Jon and my dad figured it out so it didn't look like we were all doing a secret handshake ;)
As for the rest of the day, Jon and I separated - he stayed in the room on the laptop and I went to the pool and chatted with my relatives and then walked around with my sister and cousin. Remember those declarations of love? Well, one of us hadn't written them yet and one of us was very stressed out trying to finish them. So I visited with family and friends. In fact, he needed the entire day so in the evening, I went with some friends for sushi in Hale'iwa (FYI: Bonsai Sushi is pretty good!) to give one of us more time to finish his DOLs. Hee hee, I'm just giving him a hard time now ... I was much nicer at the time because he was seriously stressed out!
No pictures from the breakfast, the rehearsal or with my relatives (umm, cousin, please also send me digital copies of your pics!) But I do have a bad ass picture of the sunrise from our hotel room:

I think the sun rises were one of the highlights of my days. While The Man was asleep, I would grab the newspaper outside of our hotel door. Then I would make a cup of coffee and sit on our balcony, read the paper and watch the sun rise. I know, I am a 65 year old woman trapped in a 29 year old body. But it was seriously absolute bliss for me!
The Man also did a time lapse thingee of the same sunset. It's beautiful. I only wish we knew how to use our mic so you can hear the waves (we had our camera in a waterproof shell so we could take under water. Unfortunately, it greatly muffled the audio.) So if you've got time to check it out:

No editing capabilities yet ... we're working on it! So you will have to watch this in boring silence. I can't wait until I can edit, add music and do all that fun stuff with our videos!

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OK, I have to also give a shout out to The Man. We were together for 21 days, often times the entire day with no breaks! Why is this significant? We didn't fight the entire time! I know, we've had a few vacations now where we didn't fight, thank goodness, but 21 days is a long time to be together all the time. Miracle of miracles ... no fighting! Sure, I broke down crying several times during our adventure hike (oh, don't you worry, there will be a whole entry on that) but we got along very well on our entire trip. In fact, I think it was our best vacation to date. It probably helped tremendously that we have lived together for a while but it was really awesome. And the whole experience just reignited my big ol' crush on The Man. I actually missed him today while he was at work and I worked from home. Good lor', what am I ... 15?! So big ups to The Man for being one kick ass hubby! Oh, and Cyn, you had asked if anything was different now that we are married and I didn't have an answer for you. I asked The Man and he said that not much has changed. But when we refer to each other as "husband" and "wife", it feels like we're playing around. And he's kind or right ... it does! We are adjusting to the new titles. I've slipped and called him "my boyfriend" a couple of times.

First two days in Hawaii

We arrived in Honolulu on Sunday, April 13th. That day also happened to be our six year anniversary! Anyway, due to the changes in our airlines, we were not checking into our hotel room at the Turtle Bay Resort as planned. Our new flight included a layover in LAX so we spent most of Sunday traveling. We had appointments all morning on Monday so it would be silly of us to drive to North Shore at night only to come back to Honolulu the very next morning. Instead of driving to where our wedding would take place, we made our way to the Holiday Inn Waikiki.
Here's the thing - I am not above staying at a Holiday Inn. I think I have a few friends who wouldn't step foot into one and I totally understand. But that's not me. I've stayed at many hotels and my only requirement is that it's clean. Hell, the last time I was in Hawaii I stayed in a room that smelled slightly of urine (my over active imagination made me think that frat guys had occupied the room before us and one of them had gotten so drunk that they peed somewhere on the carpet. Kind of gross but whatever.) But you know what? My friend and I just dealt with it because the room was clean and we were hardly in the room except to sleep and shower. Anyway, my point is that while I'm not above staying at places like the Holiday Inn ... it just wasn't part of the original plan. But we adapted because it was the reasonable thing to do.
The Man and I had checked in by 8:00pm. Thank jeebus, it was a very clean room. But unlike all my other vacations in Hawaii, I was not relaxed. Our first appointment on Monday was at 6:00am in Pearl City. Serious. We didn't want to have to leave North Shore on Tuesday so the only way I could fit all our appointments comfortably was to set our wedding license appointment at 6:00am. I had never been to Pearl City so we didn't know how long it would take for us to get there from Waikiki. We set our alarm for 4:30am. The Man, bless his heart, knew this was not the time to futz around and was really good about getting ready on time. I know, it sounds crazy but our internal clocks were still three hours ahead so it wasn't soooo bad. Anyway, this is what our Monday looked like:
6:00am - Appointment with the wedding licensee in Pearl City
9:00am - Appointment with the wedding photographer in Waikiki (he thought it was at 10:00am so we ended up meeting them at 9:30ish.)
11:30am - Hair & make up run through for me/ haircut for The Man
Afternoon - drive to Turtle Bay, check-in
3:00pm - Appointment with Turtle Bay Resort coordinator
We were HELLA busy our first full day. Yes, I wrote HELLA ... because it's true! But the reward was when we finally got to go to our hotel ...
Turtle Bay Resort is beautiful. It is the first four star hotel I've stayed in (I know I sound like a bumpkin but I told you my reasons.) I didn't tell many people but I chose this location from the feedback I received from close friends when I grilled them. I had never stepped foot on the resort but I knew I loved the beauty of the North Shore because I had been there many times. I had asked one friend who had attended a wedding at TBR what she thought. She told me she considered the resort for her own wedding but knew her family would want it to be in Waikiki. But she thought it was very pretty and definitely recommended it. Then I asked another friend who grew up there and he said that, hands down, that is the spot he would pick if and when he ever got married. He said, in his opinion, it was the nicest spot on the island. From those testimonials, and from the pictures I saw on the web, that is how I made my decision.
Another thing that you have to understand is that I just love being in Hawaii. I love it for a many reasons and it's why I go back year after year. For one, people celebrate their brown skin there. One too many cultures look down upon having dark brown skin and, unfortunately, have a society that aspires to be very fair or the lightest shade of brown possible (I know some of y'all have taken Asian American studies and we have talked about how horrible this is!) Hawaii also reminds me a lot of my favorite aspects of the Philippines - lush tropical beauty, friendly atmosphere, and, by physical appearance, I blend in! It was a nice change from many of the other places I've visited and have stuck out like a sore thumb. And just like the Philippines, the hospitality can't be beat (I should mention that The Man and I noticed during this visit just how many Filipinos work in hospitality - there are a lot!) and there is just a different pace - a little slower which is a lot nicer. Of course, what really did me in was the the few years that I danced hula. This made me appreciate the beauty and history of Hawaii because so many hulas and chants are about that - places in Hawaii, the appreciation of nature and the history of its people. My kumu made sure that we studied and understood the importance of each hula and chant and it really made a difference.
When we arrived at TBR, the front desk told us that our room was not yet ready. They apologized and said we could walk around for a little bit and then check back in with them. So The Man and I explored and saw that the resort was simply gorgeous. What I loved about TBR was how the property let the ocean be the main point of attraction. They kept the grounds very simple and clean yet made it look very natural. Here's what I mean:

OK, I included this picture because I'm wearing false lashes from the make up run through? I love false lashes!!!


So beautiful. I was so happy that I could barely contain myself. The Man was very happy because he saw it was the complete opposite of Waikiki which he cannot stand. My boy is a country boy at heart so he was quite pleased with the open space and lack of crowds. We checked in and were pleasantly surprised that we would be staying on the top floor - a guarantee for a beautiful view, I thought. We schlepped our bags to the room and that is when I completely fell in love with the place:

My friends asked the concierge to cover our hotel room with rose petals! They also left chocolate and coconut covered macademia nuts, passion fruit wine and an orchid lei! This wouldn't be the first time that my two close friends showed their fabulousness.

Can you believe this view? As soon as I opened the sliding glass doors, the sound of the waves filled the room.


A couple of minutes later, a bellboy brought up sparkling wine sent by the general manager.

I have never, ever had a room with an ocean view, much less an ocean view like this. Usually, my hotel scenery have been what I called "look left" views - I crane my neck out the window, look left, and in between two skyscrapers, I could see the ocean. And I was quite happy with that view! But this ... this was something else. I read somewhere that when TBR was taken over by it's the present owner, they had done a ton of renovations instead of demolishing and starting over. It was because if they did demolish the hotel, with the current laws, there is no way the state would let them build the new property so close to the water. So instead, they did over $70 million in renovations. And I completely understand. To be this close to the water is amazing. I visited my parents and my sister and both had spectacular views too.
I couldn't stop hugging and kissing The Man because I was so happy. This absolutely was the perfect place for our wedding.

Nearly a thousand pictures to sort through ...

and here's one:


I have the post-vacation blues :( Not only did I get to have 16 days in Hawaii, the longest I've stayed of all my trips, but I flippin' got married and had my honeymoon there! What a great vacation for so many reasons. And I definitely want to write all about it just so I can look back and read all the memories.
This was the first time, though, that I had jet lag and am having a hard time adapting to the three hour difference. With that, and having the post-vacation blues, I haven't been in the mood to start writing. Instead, I've taken the past three days to upload lots of pictures onto an online album. Then I went in and deleted the pictures that were almost identical or had people blinking. I'm sure I let some slip through, though. These are all the pictures shot by our photographers. Why didn't you just burn the CDs and mail them to the online album company, you ask? Well, when I tried to burn them, both my computers rejected it, saying I needed a DVD burner. What the heck? Anyway, 72 hours later, all the pictures have finally been uploaded. Seriously, my computer has been on all night and day, uploading the pictures. Thank goodness I can just leave it and go to sleep. I still need to download all the pictures we took before the wedding and our honeymoon.
So I leave you with one picture. And I hope to start writing soon!

PS: A couple of you wondered about the whole "Matt Damon" thing from the slideshow post. In my declaration of love during the ceremony (because they weren't vows but DOL is a bit formal, isn't it?), I had started off by calling The Man my "Filipino Matt Damon." I guess our photographer thought it was a hoot and highlighted it in our slideshow. It really only gets people wondering why it's there in the first place. But I don't mind :)

Our wedding at Turtle Bay

It is our last day in Hawaii! Our photographer gave us this slideshow yesterday. There are a few photos that I'd rather do without (like me crying! Or me pointing at The Man and laughing!) Jon also pointed out that there are A LOT of photos of me, definitely more than him. Hehehe. But I guess all photographers do that, right? Take a lot of the bride and not so much of the groom. Anyway, we have TONS of photos that we need to go through once we get home. We really liked our photographer and can't wait to see the album. And the video! So here is a very small peek of our wedding day.

And away we go!

Leaving you with just a small portion of our wedding music. The Man and I chose these songs together ... he was actually interested in giving his input and I was actually happy to have it!

Introduction of Groom & Groom's mother/Best Man & Matron of Honor
E Ku'u Morning Dew by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole
The Man chose this song because he loves this artist's music. I do, too.

Processional - Bride & parents
White Sandy Beach by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole
We chose this song because Jon instantly fell in love with it when he heard it for the first time. And we both love the beach ... it's one of our favorite places to be together. We are so happy to be getting married by the ocean.

Recessional
Somewhere Over the Rainbow/ What a Wonderful World by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole
I love this song so much - ever since I saw the most beautiful hula choreographed to it in San Francisco. It took a little convincing for The Man to OK it. He thinks it's played out (we've heard it at two other weddings) and it's often used for commercials, as well. But I adore it so The Man gave in :)

Signing of wedding certificate/ license
The Road That Never Ends by Keali'i Reichel
I've also seen a beautiful hula danced to this song. The lyrics just seem perfect for when we seal the deal ;) Unfortunately, it is not on Project Playlist.

Wedding Video
For Once in My Life by Stevie Wonder
Our videographer asked us to choose three songs for our wedding video. In addition to White Sandy Beach, Somewhere Over the Rainbow/ What a Wonderful World, we also chose this song because we love Stevie Wonder and the lyrics to For Once in my Life. We almost chose Overjoyed but The Man said it might make the entire video too emotional. The Stevie Wonder version is not on Project Playlist so we will make do with Frank Sinatra on the blog but Stevie is what we wanted for our memories :)

What is UP with the airlines?!

At least another one has NOT bitten the dust. They have just grounded 1 of every 3 flights for the past two days. Hmmm. I checked the website and it looks like they project major cancellations from now until Sunday.

I'm a little nervous for my guests. I have three people flying on American Airlines, one of which is supposed to leave on Sunday. What. A. Pain. I hope that their flights go as scheduled. If not, I hope that there is at least some sort of resolution that can occur with the hotels so they don't have to pay for fees if, heaven forbid, they end up not being able to make it.
What the HELL is going on with all these airlines?!?!
OK, enough about that ... happy thoughts.
I think most of you know where I'm getting married. This is where the ceremony will be taking place:


I am NOT using chair covers (they are $20 a pop.) Nor will I have a big flower arrangement above us ... but you get the gist. There will be an aisle runner with loose orchids framing the sides. And the ocean will be our backdrop which makes me so very happy.
Here is where our reception is taking place:


Half of the party will be on solid flooring (I figured it would be easier for our older guests) and half will be in the sand. We could have had everyone on solid flooring but I like the idea of being right on the beach. The restaurant has replaced the tents with a permanent awning. What I liked about this venue is that we will be very close to the water. In fact, the only assigned seating we did was the sweetheart table ... when people look at the two of us, the ocean will be right behind us.
Everything I envision, in my head, seems really wonderful. I'm hoping it ends up that way in real life!

The joy through the insanity

I am not an event planner. My preference is to just show up and have fun. The Man is even less of a party planner than me. Between his barong not being here yet and the fact that he is going to be saying "declarations of love" in front of our families, The Man cannot wait for the wedding to be done. And, while I know I'm going to enjoy the day of our wedding ... I have to agree with him! We are both really looking forward to the vacation portion of it all. For me, it's the worrying that everything will go according to plan, people will have fun, like the food and that everything will end up as nice as I envisioned it in my head. Because, let's face it, it all sounds well and good but who the heck knows how things are going to play out. Take it for however it may sound but we both cannot wait to get married!
Despite the stress, there is a lot of joy in my life right now. Besides the fact that I'm getting hitched to the most fantastic guy I know, there have been other wonderful treats as the day gets closer. People in my life have rallied together and have made me feel so loved. They have made the days closer to the wedding actually bearable and having given me pockets of stress-free fun during such a busy time.
A few close friends got together and decided to throw me a tea party two weeks ago. With "penis" as the theme. No lie. Serves me right as these are the same women who had to put up with me for two years telling them different vagina words as they pass me by. Just to refresh your memory, my favorites to utter were snatch, cooter, poon, vajayjay ... it's been so long, I can't remember the rest. Anyway, I think two of the three women went to sex shops up and down the peninsula for this little party. There was a blow up doll (I think his name was Peter Peckerwood but I'm not sure), penis-shaped tea sandwiches, penis-shaped haupia (that was interesting considering that haupia is the color, of, umm, you know), penis skewers, penis straws, penis confetti ... you get the picture. Keep in mind, while I am very comfortable all topics vagina, I have never been a fan of penis decorations. I think that was the point.
But the effort ... these women were so sweet. They made delicious treats and tried to keep everything low fat and sugar free! One friend made scrumptious coconut bread pudding, pineapple pastries ... all sugar free. Another woman made the sandwiches with whole wheat bread and low fat egg salad and tuna salad. The other friend made a delicious salad with mandarin oranges and dried cranberries and also baked tortilla-d (in lieu of breaded) chicken. They were all trying to support my effort to eat healthily, especially before the wedding.
As a thank you, I made them little care kits to take to Hawaii. It included spray sunblock, chapstick with SPF, different types of their favorite alcohol in the small sizes (like the ones you get on a plane) and a travel-size Aleve for any headaches or hangovers :) These women are so sweet. They even made up a game where they asked Gil a bunch of questions before through email and then quizzed me on how well we knew each other. I think I got 98% right! I told him we should go on that Newlyweds show but, again, way outside his comfort zone ;)
I've included only one picture that is very modest and reserved. The other pictures with the penis paraphernalia ... well, I'm just not that comfortable posting!

And then, last week, my knitting group threw me a surprise get together. They told me it was a Sex and the City party (most of the women didn't see this show until my friend and I introduced it to them. And whooooo-doggie! They love it! Hehehe.) We've all talked about watching a few episodes before the movie comes out ... which we're going to see together ;) Anyway, I arrive and it ends up being a small dinner party for me! They were so sweet. One of them, a lovely lady in her 60s, decided to make me a condom lei. Seriously. I made her tell me the story of how she selected condoms at Target - "I wanted to get the colorful ones so it would make a pretty lei!" - and hid it among her other stuff because she was embarrassed. That alone made my night. But they, too, were so sweet and wanted to support my efforts to eat healthily. The dinner was all about making our own sushi hand rolls! It was a truly beautiful spread - fresh crab, unagi (they remembered that this is my absolute favorite!), cucumber, avocado, sprouts ... and they also made two different types of edamame to make it interesting - garlic and teriyaki. Just like my other friends, they really went out of their way to make it a healthy yet delicious dinner. They also made it festive by having flowers, colorful lantern lights, a little banner and cheesy but fun leis (sans condoms for the other folks.) Oh, and the one group member who couldn't make it even crocheted me a whip.
Foreel.
Here are these lovely ladies:

I feel really blessed. I am very thankful for the wonderful friends I have in my life. I did not expect any of this because we are having such a small wedding that I figured these kind of parties don't happen unless one has a big to do. But even though most of my friends are not coming, they still wanted to send me off. So although I am stressed, sometimes irritated (slightly to majorly, depending on the situation), and just wanting the wedding to already happen, I am so very happy.

What a week

For the most part, this wedding has been drama-free. There was the ordeal with certain folks thinking they didn't have to RSVP ... but with the help of my sister, it got done. Then there was the delay of my wedding dress ... but it still came six weeks prior to the wedding date. And from the horror stories I've heard from friends, all of this really isn't that bad.
And then there was this week.
It first started off with one of my vendors and I kind of getting into it. Well, it was more like she was not responding to my emails or calls and I was freaking out because on April 1st, I realized I had less than 16 days to finalize everything. Although I asked for everything in March, I still didn't have a cake estimate, overall final budget or a date set to meet prior to the wedding. I was getting fed up and seriously considered figuring out a way to throw together a reception using the hotel instead of the restaurant. But I also knew that I was getting too emotional (aka pissed) about the whole situation so I asked my sister to step in and be the contact person moving forward. It was the best decision I could have made. Sister swooped in, comforted me, comforted the vendor (we won't even go into how much I thought it was crap that the vendor needed reassuring on how great she truly is) and it seemed like everything was resolved and back on track.
And then there was Thursday.
I got out of my early morning yoga class and had 8 missed calls. What the heck happened?!

Oh yes. I knew that Aloha Airlines had filed for bankruptcy last week. Nooo problem. We weren't using them to fly from the Bay Area to Oahu. We booked ATA flights. We had booked Aloha to fly from Oahu to Kauai but no biggie. We were told that ATA would be taking over all the flights.

That's right. The crap done hit the fan, girl. Both my mom and aunt had been trying to get a hold of me. They wanted to know if I knew that ATA filed for bankruptcy that morning and all flights have been cancelled. The two of them were searching furiously online to see if there were any flights left. They found an 11-hour flight with a layover in Arizona for $600.
Up until this past week, I thought I was a fairly calm bride. People have asked me throughout the eight months how the wedding plans were going and I didn't have much to say. But this was something else. And imagine that my mom and other family members were all riled up, rightfully so because they don't want to spend double what they had originally spent on airfare, and whipping up a nice batch of crazy all around me yet I had no way to even begin fixing the issue because I wasn't anywhere near a computer.
I didn't doubt for a moment that the wedding will happen. I just wasn't sure how we were going to pull off everything smoothly. We have to fly out on Sunday because all our appointments with the vendors and venues are on Monday. I may have been able to reschedule them for Tuesday but that is the day of our welcome breakfast for our guests, wedding rehearsal and the day we have to go back to Honolulu for our wedding license. And whatever else we forgot that will make us run around to do last minute things.
I debated if I should call The Man. I mean, what could he do at work? He no longer worked in an office and wouldn't have access to a computer. But he's also my best friend and I needed to share the crazy that had been all whipped up for me because I hoped he would make me feel better. So I called him. I asked him if he had heard the news about ATA. The Man said his boss asked him about it first thing in the morning. When The Man told him we were using ATA, his boss let him use his computer and phone to try to rebook our flights (to the wedding and the honeymoon.) The Man couldn’t get through to the contact numbers given by ATA so he asked his boss if he could take the rest of the day off to fix all of this from home.
I was nowhere near tears until I heard him say he was trying to take care of it. I was so happy to hear that that I almost started crying! Maybe it was relief that this wasn't something that I would have to try and fix like so many of the other things that have to do with the wedding. But no, the man swooped in and took it all on himself. He went all all the travel websites and after an hour, found a flight for$395 which was a steal compared to the Arizona layover flight and the $1,000 flights from United and American. Unfortunately, it has a lay over in LA but it’s only 35 minutes. (We have a straight flight on the way back.) We can live with that! We will be arriving on Sunday at 9:30pm so that means instead of getting to our hotel at 11:30am like our original plan, we get to our hotel sometime between 11:30pm and 12:00am! But considering our options, this was by far the best one.
We no longer have a straight flight from Kauai (our honeymoon) to Oakland like we did before. Instead, we have to fly back to Oahu and then leave for home from there.This also extended our trip from April 26th, when we were supposed to go home, to April 28th. We still need to find a hotel to stay at for those two days extra days. While I love vacationing in Hawaii, staying for over two weeks is a long time from home. And yes, laugh if you will, but we will truly miss our puppies, too! It's a long time to be away from both. We are homebodies! But if we have to get stuck with two extra days anywhere, Hawaii is probably my #1 choice. And, because the times we would be arriving and leaving have changed for both our wedding and honeymoon, The Man also had to make sure he changed everything with our car rentals. Because how much would it suck if the car rental place wasn't open when we come in at 10:30pm (we are anticipating getting our luggage and shlepping it to the car rental place may take a bit of time.) I hope we remembered everything that is affected by our change in flight plans.
Anyhow, everything is back on track and we are only spending $200 more on airfare rather than than the $1,200 we might have had to spend. The airlines fiasco hasn't hurt our attendance too much either. So far, only one couple has dropped from our list, making our party 38 now. I'm bummed that my aunt and uncle can't make it but completely understand. They were not able to find the same deal as we did and would have to spend double than their orginal airfare. We were happy to hear that most of our relatives booked on either Hawaiian Airlines, United or American. Phewwww.
So that was our week. What a pain in the ass. Today we found out that The Man's barong wasn't sent out like it was promised. The lady had told him that they had only one more barong in the style and size that The Man wanted and that she would send it out. Today she left a what she said was a "courtesy call" that they didn't have any in stock but if they get a shipment in, it may arrive on April 11th. The Man was not a happy man today. He has special ordered one from another vendor that is supposed to arrive this Wednesday. Cross your fingers for us. We did, however, take care of the rest of his outfit! We went to Banana Republic and bought some dark brown trousers and dark brown belt. Then we went to Macy's (bless the kind soul who gave us a $50 gift certificate for the bridal shower) and put the gift card towards a pair of dark brown dress shoes and socks. If you're wondering, yes, he was definitely making me sweat by waiting until the weekend before to buy his clothes for our wedding. But I was beginning to think that he was going to wait until we got to Waikiki so I am quite pleased that all of those purchases are now checked off of his list.
Send us good wedding thoughts from now until April 16th! Although my sister assured me that these crazy incidents guarantee a wonderful marriage, I think we're all stocked up on craziness. And wasn't that message along the same lines of when Carrie was trying to comfor Charlotte when she was having a crappy 2nd wedding? I'm hoping that the actual event ends up nice!

Exactly three weeks away

For inviting such a small group of people to our wedding, I have been very blessed to be surrounded by very loving family and friends. Last weekend, my aunt and mom threw me (well, more like "us" since men folk were also included in the invitation!) a bridal shower which included a LOT of family and family friends. There was so much food that I could just feel my two months of consistent work outs just fly out the door! ;) They had the event catered with Filipino and Hawaiian food (they wanted to tie in the fact we are getting married in Hawaii) and a beautiful cake. I told Jon that the cake was prettier than our wedding cake because I am not a fan of fondit. He said, "Don't say that! Our will be pretty." But I know better - fondit makes for a more attractive cake. It's fine, though, because I like the way whipcream tastes more and that's what is going to serve as icing on our cake! Anyhow, I'd love to share pictures but The Man and I are doofs. He had charged the battery for our new-ish camera but when we got ready to leave, the camera didn't work! So we took my trusty Nikon, thinking the battery was charged. When we got there, it crapped out on us too. I'm hoping that my cousin's camera will have good photos. So I only have one photo - it's of me and Kim!

Kim, I hope you don't mind I posted this. I think it's a flattering picture of you even though I'm really shiny!
Well, I actually do have a couple more pictures but they are of people eating (The Man took them) and I don't think it would be nice to post them. So I cropped one to show some of the food :D

This is just a portion of the table and maybe half of the spread.
The Man strongly dislikes social functions because of his shyness but he was pretty excited about the food. I had asked him earlier that day if we could do some yoga when we got home and he looked at me very seriously and said, "Hon, there's no way. I'm going to eat good tonight." Fair enough.
The people who attended were incredibly generous. We couldn't believe how giving everyone was and it was not something we expected. Armi, thank you and Peter Panda for our awesome Fondue Pot. I'm sooo excited to take that out for the holidays!!! Kim, thank you and Ryan for the tricked out Crock Pot. That is going to come in handy when we get back from the honeymoon. Cousin Mon, not sure if read this but your gift was so cute and not nearly as naughty as you think! My mom would have been ok - promise :) We received so much more but I know the givers don't read this little blog! I will say that much of the money we received will go straight to the puppy sitter. I cannot tell you how exciting it is to be able to do that because I would become really sad every time I thought of the big fat check I was going to have to cut for our puppy sitter!
As I mentioned, I feel very fortunate to have so much love in my life. After the holidays, my sister was sweet enough to arrange a spa day when she was in town. She invited a couple of friends from the Bay Area to join us. It was a great day of pampering and relaxation. This weekend, the small group of friends that are joining us on our wedding day are throwing me an intimate get together. I know for a fact that it is not mom or mother-in-law friendly. But that's all I know. I'm only a tiny bit nervous! Thankfully, I know my friends enough to know that they don't enjoy strippers so at least that won't happen. (I am not at all a fan of a oiled up guy in a banana hammock trying to throw me up in the air and dry hump me. And yes, I've actually seen that happen to another woman.) I'm sure it will be a lot of drinking and dirty talk - my kind of party! Again, I feel really blessed to have such wonderful family and friends. And holy smokes, it's three weeks away!!!!!

PS: For all you travellers, any recommendations regarding luggage? We need to buy some really soon!

Jam packed weekend!

Says the girl who normally hangs around the house with The Man and their two pups.

On Saturday I went to get my dressed altered. Again. I think I must have been so focused on the fact that my dress needed to seriously be hemmed that I didn't look at anything else. Then a few days later, I wanted to see how the dress looked with the necklace I had made. Thank goodness I did that! I realized that my straps were too loose and my V-neckline was very low. How come I didn't notice this before?! Well, one fixes the other so that's why I brought it back to the tailor on Saturday. He is also going to fix the bustle (is that the spelling?) so that it doesn't show. After I dropped off my dress, my friend and I went to the St. Patrick's Day parade in San Francisco.
Earlier last year, I vowed to myself that I would partake, at least one time, in many of the festivities that make the Bay Area a fun place to live. Well, this one was a doozie. Oooo-weeee, talk about a lot of drinking! There was beer EVERYWHERE! And I think every Irish person in the Bay Area made a showing which is fantastic since I don't see too many where I live (Little Mexico. And yes, I'm allowed to call it this because my Mexican friends nicknamed it.) I'm all about diversity. So the beer was flowing which was great for the beer drinkers but not so much for me. My friend and I ordered a big Diet Coke at Burger King and then went to the nearest liquor store, bought some rum and dumped it in. What a little piece of heaven.
You can take the girl out of the ghetto but you can't take the ghetto out of the girl.
Although, in its concealed Burger King cup, at least we didn't throw caution (and good taste) into the wind and drink out of a paper bag. After we made our concoction, we made our way back to the Beer Garden and that was a ton more fun! Truthfully, I didn't see a lick of the parade. We were with a group that wanted to stay in the Beer Garden and so that's where we stayed. I think the Beer Garden was designed so they can have people legitimately drink right outside of City Hall and not get in trouble. Sweet! What was also great was that the St. Patrick's Day parade brought out everyone. Of course, there was little brown me who was obviously not Irish. But I also saw a Chinese Bagpipe player, an entire Hispanic family dressed in green and many other ethnicities tht wanted to help the Irish pay tribute to their day. Fun!
Thank goodness it was a daytime activity because on Sunday, today, I had a three hour yoga workshop. Starting at 6:00am. Back in the city.
Oh sweet baby jeezus, it was REALLY hard getting up at 4:00am. I was meeting back up with my friend on the Peninsula at 5:00am and then we were carpooling back up to San Francisco so we could be there by 5:30am. I know I've been waking up pretty GD early to workout but even 4:00am was a little extreme for me.
But back to the yoga workshop. OK, I do not claim to be a true blue Yogi. I really enjoy the classes I take at the gym but haven't been a regular at a yoga studio. And I most certainly haven't attended a three hour workshop. This class KICKED MY ASS. The room was set at a comfortable 70 degrees but quickly warmed with the 70+ people in the class. I was drenched in my own sweat. This was a little uncomfortable but I felt like I was getting a great workout. What was not at all great was that other people's sweat was everywhere. I am not exaggerating. We had to do inversions using the wall so people were walking all around the room to stake claim on a piece of the wall. There was enormous amounts of foot sweat on the floor. And some people didn't think it was rude to step on other people's mat. With their foot sweat. Anyway, because we were using the wall to support us for handstands, there was also sweat on the wall from feet as well as hands. Yes, there was literally sweat dripping from the walls.
Maybe you don't recall my hang up with bodily fluids but I am very uncomfortable being in contact with other people's sweat. I don't enjoy being splashed with it, rubbed against with it or touching it with any parts of my body. And while I was pretty distracted by how physically challenging the class was, I still noticed all the sweat around me. When I finally walked out of the class three hours later, my feet were dripping with my and many other people's sweat. I just can't get over something like that. I wish I could, I wish I didn't care, but that really grosses me out.
I am very happy to go back to the little cold studio in the gym that I belong to and do my yoga there. With sweat free walls and floors. Because even though I feel like I just ran a marathon and got one of the best workouts that I've had in a good long time, I just can't get past the sweat. It's a hang up of mine that I wish I could change but I can't. And it's really quite a shame since my mom's profession was microbiology and all she did was deal with bodily fluids. But I fear that I will always be this way which means limited or no yoga classea at yoga studios. And I am A-OK being an Amateur or Novice Yogi.

Pee in my cheerios. And a $48 torture contraption.

DAMMIT! The beautiful, gorgeous, and thick yoga mat that I bought is USELESS! I had inherited my old mat so I have never gone mat shopping before. I checked the reviews on Amazon and everyone loved it. So why, OH WHY, did my mat fail me when I took it to class? I'm not a huge perspirer but I was losing traction on my hands and feet. Seriously, my groin muscles should not hurt when I'm in warrior positions (but they did because I fought not to end up in the splits.) I even gave it one more chance at another class but I was slipping and sliding so much that I turned the mat over, hoping to get more traction. I didn't. OK, so I'm not crying but how annoying! Anyway ...
I bought my wedding undergarments today at Nordstrom. First I tried on Spanx. OH LAWDEEE!!! Those are some intense pieces of underoos! It was the first time I regretted choosing a sheath for a wedding gown rather than a puffier dress. I wouldn't have to deal with underwear lines with a nice tulle and petticoat number! Spanx definitely did the job, keeping everything in. But My main concern was lines and making sure my dress didn't go up my butt (something I didn't even think about until my Sister mentioned it. And, let's face it, it's pretty funky when you see a gal's butt practically munching on the dress. Nasty, I know but what a visual, hm?) Anyway, I was able to see the lines from the Spanx through my dress. Well, that defeated the whole purpose of getting bodyshape wear. (Under my dress, it looked like I was wearing biker shorts, Steve Urkel-style.) I should also mention that Spanx are HOT. I needed someone to fan me after getting into one of those contraptions. And then wearing it over a period of time? How was I going to survive in Hawaii?!
Then my friend unearthed the Body Wrap from another rack - she had mistakenly thought she had worn Spanx at her wedding but it was actually Body Wrap. Ooh! It was a much lighter fabric (imagine panty hose verses biker shorts.) But when she gave this undergarment to me, it looked like it could fit a toddler. No lie, it was about a foot and a half long. Then she told me that it will actually stretch from the bottom of my bra to a little below my knee. Serious?

Yes, oh yes, that is the Body Wrap. Pretty sexy, right? But I honestly can't knock it. It's light, it doesn't roll down (I hope!) and it keeps everything in order. It doesn't necessarily slim me down but it holds everything in place. Plus, since it ends below my knees, there are no lines on my dress. Of course the first thing I did when I got home was show The Man. I held it up and said that this is what I'm going to be wearing under my wedding gown and we would be makin' babies after he saw me in this.
He looked at it, a little confused at first (it looks like it could may one of our puppies) and said, "How much did it cost?" I pretended I didn't hear.
Whooohooo! One more thing checked off the To Do list!

Hellllooooooooo dress

Background: I was told in September that I would receive my wedding gown in mid-January. In mid-January I was told due to Chinese New Year that I would actually receive it mid-February. Not understanding the relevance, this only frustrated me because that is like telling me I won't receive it on time because of Groundhog Day. What does Chinese New Year have to do with me?! Evidently, it comes from China and all production comes to a screeching halt when CNY comes around. Some of you wondered why I didn't go apeshit on the boutique owner. While I was sure to tell her that I was upset about the delay, I didn't feel like I was in a position to let her have it. First, it truly wasn't her fault that it was delayed. Of course, since this apparently happens every year with this company she should take this important fact into account when telling a bride when her dress will arrive - that is her fault. But there was no way she could make it come any faster. I would basically be yelling at her to make me feel better. The other reason I did not go apeshit is because you may remember that my dress is quite inexpensive because it is a bridesmaid dress. I felt that if I were to have a nasty exchange with her that she would say, "You know what? Here is your money back. This certainly isn't worth my time." And then I would be up S-Creek. So, albeit a bit uncharacteristic of me, I waited somewhat patiently until the gown arrived.

I received an email Friday afternoon from Debra (the boutique owner) who said the dress is here. FINALLY! I told her I could come by around 12pm on Saturday. On Saturday morning, I woke up early like a good little bride-to-be and went to the gym to work out. Then I drove across the bridge to go to a Vinyasa yoga class. I skipped coffee with my yoga friend so I can go back over the bridge and straight home.
I asked The Man if he would come with me to pick it up. For some reason, I didn't feel like having a friend accompany me. Jon said sure so I told him to wait for me while I took a quick shower. It was raining hard outside and since I was going to try on the dress before I took it home, it was a perfect time to wear sweats. But I didn't. This is especially odd since, because of my job, I've been looking like a camp counselor lately. I put on my warmest wrap dress, stockings and I took the time to put on my make up - like The Man and I were going out for dinner! When I told Jon I was ready for us to leave, he noticed I was dressed up and asked me why. I told him that I wanted to look nice when I saw my dress. "You got dressed up to meet your wedding gown?" I did! It sounds so strange but it's true.
We went to the bridal boutique and were told to wait a few minutes. There was a bride with her friend choosing a bridesmaid dress. The Man, because he's such a good sport and wanted to be supportive, patiently waited and thumbed through wedding magazines with me. Once the two women looked like they're going to leave, I turned to Jon and told him that he couldn't see me try it on. Now I know I was very unconventional in having help me pick out the dress. And while he did see similar dresses on me he has not seen the wedding dress on me. He looked suprised and asked, "Well, do you want me to leave?" and I said, "Mmm, you can either look away when I try it on or wait in the car." He said he'd rather wait in the car, kissed me and said goodbye to Debra the boutique owner.
Debra and I talked a few moments about the bride that was before me (the gal had come to Debra the week before and let her know she was getting married in two weeks! She actually found a dress that fit her in Debra's samples and bought it off the rack right then and there. Can you believe that? Two weeks!!) After we chatted about that, she asked, "So do you want to see your dress?" OF COURSE! She handed me a garment bag and told me to try it on. I went into the bathroom, hung the hanger on the hook and slowly unzipped the dress.
Hellllooooooooo dress.
This simple gown, this dress that was designed for a bridesmaid but the dress I chose as my wedding gown is the dress I will be wearing when both my parents walk me down the aisle. This is the dress I'll be wearing when I exchange my vows with The Man. This is the dress I will be wearing when I tell The Man why I love him so much and how much he truly means to me. This is the dress I will be wearing when I change my name for the man that I love and become Mrs. Ramirez. This is the dress I'll be wearing when we are pronounced husband and wife in front of our families and loved ones. This is the dress that I will be wearing in the wedding photos that we will eventually show our children and grandchildren.
Do you see why it was so important that I looked nice when I first met this dress?
I have hardly gotten overly emotional about this wedding (by that I mean mushy, not the fury or frustration I have felt regarding RSVPs:) I think the only thing that makes me tear up is thinking about the declarations of love we will write and say to each other. I wasn't at all emotional when I chose this dress as I wanted to get the process done as quickly as possible! (I only went to one bridal boutique.) I didn't cry or get watery eyes when I tried on my gown but, somehow, this dress became a significant symbol to me. I took it off the hanger and carefully put it on. There was no way I would get make up on this! I asked Debra to finish zipping the back of my dress.
It fit perfectly.
This was suprisingly since this dress wasn't tailor-made for me. But other than needing it hemmed considerably, everything fit perfectly. I told her I wanted to lose weight before the wedding and she told me that I could lose a few pounds but not to lose anymore because the fit is really good (I am still going to try to lose weight - I don't mind at all if I have to take it in on the sides!) I looked at myself in different angles of the mirror and was so happy, so relieved, so at content ... because I finally had my wedding dress.
Debra helped me get out of it and I put it back in the hanger (again, carefully!) and back into the garment bag. After all this time, I finally had my dress. And although it was nearly two months late, it all turned out OK. I'm sure she's used to it but I gave Debra a BIG HUG before I left and thanked her for all her help. She apologized again for causing any anxiety or distress. I walked down the stairs and down the driveway to Jon. He was so sweet - he was so cautious when he arranged the garment bag so it could hang on the hook in the car and drape along the passenger seats. He knew how important this article of clothing was to me.
As soon as we got home, I went into a different room away from The Man and I took out my wedding sandals and necklace to see how it looked with the gown. They all looked very nice together. It's now tucked in my closet, waiting to hemmed and then for the big day in one month and 23 days.