Meet a new member of the family

I apologize, I should have introduced you sooner. She has been living with me since my birthday last month. Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce you to ...

Big Martha.

The Man gave me Big Martha because I needed a fridge. Before her, I used a crusty fridge in the garage that I inherited from the tenants before me. A few days prior to my birthday, The Man asked me, "Lulu, how do you feel about me buying you a fridge for a birthday present?" Admittedly, my initial reaction wasn't the most appreciative. I mean, a fridge doesn't smack of romance. But after a few seconds, I realized, "Hell yah I want a fridge!" Do you know what a pain in the ass it is to go to the garage anytime you need ingredients like milk or eggs? Not to mention that a new fridge is a major dent to Lulu's savings!

We went to a local appliance store and were helped by a very nice sales lady. She showed us Big Martha first but we wanted to look around some more. After roaming around for nearly an hour (and realizing that The Man has a fondness for GINORMOUS refrigerators) we concluded that Big Martha was "the one."

Now, you may remember my disdain for any women's nickname starting with, "Big." And, in all fairness, she isn't even that big. But in my tiny kitchen, she is the ruler. It's no longer the kitchen, it's the fridge room. For crap's sake, look at her. She biiiig!

(Phone conversation with The Man after the delivery of Big Martha -
Me: "Hey babe, the fridge came. I thought you did the measurements."
The Man: "I did! Doesn't the fridge fit? Is it blocking the doorway?"
Me: "She fits and no, she doesn't block the doorway. But she sticks out about seven inches from the counter."
The Man: "What? I thought it would stick out four inches, max."
Me: "Well, yes, but you still have to take in account the grill in the back and that it needs to be an inch from the wall. That's about 7 inches."
The Man: "Oh yahhhh." Pause. "But don't you like it?"
Me: "Yes! I love her! She's just. So. Big.")

Here is Big Martha waving to you.

(Up until last Friday, she was pretty bare, like this. The Man kept teasing me that I didn't want to dirty Big Martha with food.)

After coming to terms that she has comandeered the kitchen, Big Martha and I are getting along just fine. She fits right in with the household and has been nothing but a joy.

And that, my friends, is the story of how Big Martha became a part of my family.

Now, you must bow down before the all mighty Big Martha!