Take this job and ...

Last night was my Going Away party. My friend, who's also in charge of work events, asked me what kind of going away party I wanted. I asked for a small, intimate party at a very cute restaurant called Lure (it's four months old and looks straight out of Sex and the City. So if you're in the Peninsula, stop by, it's fabulous! OK, that was my plug.)

My party was a dutch event and I was A-OK with it. See, here's the thing. A lot of people have their going away party either at Chevy's or Red Robin. I'd rather have a dutch event at a nice place then have the j-o-b pay for everyone and their mama to eat at a mediocre restaurant. I'm not a snob but I wanted my party to be at a place that was pretty. Why? I want a place to have a nice enough atmosphere that I enjoy it when I come in stone sober and come out drunk as a skunk.

That's right, bitches, I got drunk. I had a glass of wine at another restaurant (before Lure opened.) Once at Lure, I proceeded to have another glass of wine and two glasses of a champagne mix concoction. Luckily, I ate the asian crackers they had out as well as dessert. Because Lulu loves her some dessert.

It was a WONDERFUL going away party. I was faded, laughing it up, and having a grand ol' time. Our waiter, a cool mister named Michael, asked me what I was going to be doing at my new job. I said, "Staffing Manager." He looks puzzled. My friend Maria, a little tossed herself, said "She sells people." So I went with it and told him that I was a pimp. In his proper voice, he said "Great, then I'll be your ho." When my soon-to-be-ex-boss arrived a few minutes after us, Michael introduced himself. "Good evening. I understand that this party is for her," pointed to me, "she is my pimp and I'm her ho." My boss was stunned that this could come from such a refined gentleman. She turned to me, "What did you do to him? You've only been here for 10 minutes or so!" And that's pretty much how the night went.

I have the BEST ex-coworkers. Normally, I don't list what I get as presents on my blog b/c I feel like I'm bragging. But dammit, my friends did a great job!
- The company gave me a gift certificate for a deluxe spa pedicure and manicure at my favorite nail salon, Pinkies. And guess who happens to have an appointment today at 1:30pm for that exact package? (Again, the result of having a friend who's in charge of also buying company gifts!) It was a present to myself that I booked earlier this week but now it's on the j-o-b. Sweet.
- My two closest friends gave me a $100 gift certificate to Ann Taylor. They both know that I will most likely go broke ass buying new clothes. Aren't they very thoughtful and generous? They also happen to be the culprits who introduced me to this oh-so-lovely store. But I'm not placing blame ;) I love them so much!
- And then another coworker went to my favorite knitting store, Nine Rubies, and bought a beautiful needle case that I've been coveting every time I go into the store but is way too pricey for me to justify.
- The j-o-b also extended my free gym membership for another year. I was VERY excited to hear that b/c there was no way that I was going to be able to pay $63/month.

I loved my going away party. And by the time it was over, I was in no condition to drive. Tod, a former coworker himself (and also one of the people that I drank with on Tuesday) was nice enough to drive Maria and me to her house. We stopped by a coffee shop with the hope that it would sober me up. It didn't. Tod dropped us off and Maria and I barged into her home to the dismay of her boyfriend. Poor Maria's honey. Around 10:00pm, he had to help Maria (b/c I was STILL in no condition to drive) get her car AND my car back to their place. They let me crash on their couch. Today, I woke up at 4:50am and drove my butt home.

Thanks to lots of water the night before and three Advil before sleeping, MamaLu's head doesn't hurt. I go into work this morning to tie up loose ends, get my mani/pedi, knit a little bit and then go to another going away party. At Red Robin. I think I won't tempt fate and opt for Diet Coke*.


*The Shampoo Drinking Theory: It is believed that there is still enough alcohol in your system the next day that if you drink again, it is a lot easier to get drunk again and that you do not need nearly as much alcohol as the first time. Just like when you shampoo your hair the first time versus the second time. You don't need nearly as much shampoo the second time to work up a good lather.
I THINK I came up with this theory but, then again, someone may have told me this when I was drunk and I plum forgot.

CDC Warning

The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of sexually transmitted disease. The disease is contracted through dangerous and high-risk behavior. It is called Gonorrhea-Lectim and pronounced "gonna re-elect him." Many victims contracted it in 2004, after having been screwed for the past four years. Cognitive characteristics of individuals infected include: anti-social personality disorders, delusions of grandeur with messianic overtones, extreme cognitive dissonance, inability to incorporate new information, pronounced xenophobia and paranoia, inability to accept responsibility for own actions, cowardice masked by misplaced bravado, uncontrolled facial smirking, ignorance of geography and history, tendencies toward evangelical theocracy, categorical all-or-nothing behavior. Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed at how this destructive disease originated only a few years ago from a Bush found in Texas.

Why parents drink

The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers, dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper.
"Hello."
"Is your daddy home?" he asked.
"Yes," whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him?"
The child whispered, "No."
Surprised, and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?"
"Yes."
"May I talk with her?"
Again the small voice whispered, "No."
Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is anybody else there?"
"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?"
"No, he's busy", whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?"
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the earpiece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?"
"A hello-copper" answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?" asked the boss, now truly alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper."
Alarmed, concerned, and even more then just a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for?"
Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle: "ME."

"Pack yo' $hit!"

I was going to write an entry about how nifty my office looked before I packed it up. I was going to post before and after pictures to illustrate how bare my office looks now.

But I plum forgot and now it's just "after." Since seeing "after" pictures really isn't all that interesting, here are pictures of all my office crap now at home:

I'm changing jobs and I can't move all this "decor" to my new job b/c I'm going to have a cubicle. I'm OK with that. But I'm not OK with all this stuff being at home. Decorating my office and decorating my home are two different things.

That's right folks. The picture to the left is a bamboo curtain of hula dancers. (I've turned it sideways for your convenience.) When I started my job, I couldn't commit to a big as$ framed poster so I thought this was better. It was VERY cool at work (It was! I assure you. Ask Demondoll or Tel, they've seen it.) It made my office a lot brighter and more colorful.

I've learned "kitsch-y" can be pulled off at work as long as there's a theme. Mine was "Hawaiian hula." I had pictures of men and women performing hula and Hawaiian stuff here and there. Now I have no idea where I'm going to put it all.

Also, I bought these frou-frou pillows (in blue, pink and green) because it worked in my office. They matched the fabrics from India I had covering my sterile cabinet and table top. Now these pillows don't make any sense-they are more accessories that don't fit in my home. I've ALREADY bought pictures for the home, neutral pillows for my couch and didn't think to purchase any kind of bamboo curtain because, well, do you need a reason?

But I have a bamboo curtain now.

Well, I like all my stuff enough to not want to sell it or give it away. And after talking to The Man, it appears that most of my office stuff will go into my new home office - also known as "the room with a small desk and nothing else." It was supposed to be my Yoga room. Or The Man's kung fu room. No matter that we haven't done either in that room for the past six months. Now it's where my office crap is put to pasture.

Mama Lu has joined the 21st century!

Hallelujah! I finally have DSL!

That's right, Karaway. I can now view the millions of funny and crazy clips you post daily :)

Yahoo finally got this AOL gal to convert. Sort of.

I'm keeping my AOL e-mail indefinitely. I can't let go yet. I have an unusual attachment to my e-mail address. It's the only thing that's been a constant line of communication for me.

I've moved eight times in the past eight years.

I've had three pager numbers, at least five home numbers and roughly five cell phone numbers. Oh. Now it's six. My AOL e-mail address is like my permanent home address. But it will eventually have to go because it's ridiculous to pay for AOL dial up and Yahoo DSL. Please don't tell me to use the free AIM e-mail. It's not the same thing.

Anyhow, DSL is amazing. I never knew life could be like this. I can watch video. I can download music in a timely manner. I can surf the internet footloose and fancyfree!

I think I'm tearing up. It's all just so beautiful.

Filipino reference of the day

"I love Filipinos. They're Asian.

But they're not cocky about it."

Dammit, I love her character.

I'm doing this for world peace

My last two weeks with my current job are bittersweet. I don't want to blab on and on about my anxieties, excitement and sadness. What I will tell you is that I am pretty thrilled about the drinking bonanza that will occur the next week:
Monday-drinking with close work friends
Tuesday-drinking with people who have ALREADY left my work
Wednesday-drinking with the work knitting group (But that's every week. And we do knit, too.)
Thursday-official going away party for me so drinking with a lot of my coworkers
Friday-up in the air but I'm sure I'll be drinking

Don't think I'm a lush. I'm doing all this for the greater good. See, I have a theory:
+ =


Drinks + Happy Lulu = World Peace!

A classy joint

I will be the first to admit that my people - shot out to my Filipino homies - aren't known for having upscale restaurants. They are either a) Hole-in-the-wall or b) Fast food places (i.e. Goldilocks.) My Vietnamese, Hawaiian and Mexican friends can probably relate. It's not a diss ... it is what it is. And the "fusion" places don't count because that's just a bastardization of the culture's food. Yah, I said it.

The Man and I love Filipino food so we're always open to trying out new places. We're not big fans of the fast Filipino food but we're fine with hole-in-the-wall places as long as they're clean (we won't even go into places like Ling Nam's. For the few peeps that know what I'm talking about ... you KNOW what I mean.)

Surf & Turf recently recommended a new restaurant called Gerry's Grill. Last night, I decided to take The Man out. We rolled up to a place that looked nothing like a Filipino restaurant. It was ... pretty. The bar (yes, Lulu said there's a bar!) was mahogany and glass, there were three or four big screen plasma TVs, a waterfall at the entrance, and the color scheme was understated and coordinated. Now y'all, if there's one thing about Filipino restaurants it's that they love them some LOUD colors. Which don't always coordinate. Ooooo-weeee.


This isn't what the one in our area looks like (the picture wasn't great) but here are other locations so you can see what I mean.

The music was blaring (kinda clubbish) and it was definitely an afterwork place with a hearty drink menu. The Man enjoyed his San Miguel beer and I was smitten with the pretty and CLEAN bathrooms. Priorities, people, priorities. The waitstaff was a good mix of different ethnicities but I would be a liar if I said that the clientele was diverse. Only open a month, the place was packed with A LOT of Filipinos and a sprinkle of other ethnicities. The Man and I have a hunch that the Gerry's Grill advertised on the Philippine Channel. I'm just sayin'.

The food was a little too pricey but it was good. It wasn't the most delicious Filipino food we've ever had but the presentation was very nice. It would be a good place to take someone who has never had Filipino food and might find it intimidating.

Real Filipino restaurants don't care much, if at all, about presentation and the fish head (or pig head) will still be there, in tact. And that's OK. As someone who has grown up with Filipino food, that kind of stuff doesn't scare me. In fact, in my family, we say it isn't a huge to-do unless the lechon is present. And we mean a whole pig that's been roasted and isn't cut up until it's time to eat. Foreel.

So, what's the verdict? We would go there again if we were taking out people for a special occasion (visiting, never had Filipino food, drinks, etc.) If it's just us and want to eat, we'll go to another place. For the two of us, the bill came to $49.00 w/o tip. That's a little pricey for Filipino food. But it was a good experience and we were happy for our people for finally having an attractive restaurant.

Not bad ... not good either

You Are 40% Evil

A bit of evil lurks in your heart, but you hide it well. In some ways, you are the most dangerous kind of evil.

How Evil Are You?

Leap of faith

This morning, I gave my letter of resignation. I'm leaving a place that was my second home for over two years, going back to for-profit and starting a brand spankin' new career.

I'm leaving some pretty great people. They are why I loved my organization. Do I need to remind you of the tid bits of work banter I've shared in previous entries? I've spent more time with them on a daily basis than The Man or my family. They also say, "nappy snatch" at the drop of the hat. I'm going to miss them so much.

I'm scared. I'm excited. I'm hoping that I haven't lost my mind.

On that note, I'm celebrating the Irish folk by going to my local brewery and drinking some spirits to ease my mind. I LOVE holidays that give me an excuse to go a-drinkin'.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Victoria's Sucker

Why don't Victoria's Secret Underoos fit right?

Ideally, underwear should fit your body like the picture on the left. Instead, the waistband in the back is halfway up my back.

I used to think it was me and my small caboose. But even my ample-bottomed friends have told me that these trademark cotton panties are an awkward fit for them, too.

I don't care if they're 5 for $25. I'm not buying these damn bottomless bottom saggers anymore.

Tell me, where are all the good panties?

Got the day off

I went to Watercourse Way* and it was fan-flippin'-tastic.

(Unfortunately, I wasn't on a sunny beach but it still felt good.)

Since I worked 12 hours on Friday and five hours on Saturday last week, I got today off!
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh .....
Can I get an amen??

*WW has special deals if you schedule your appointment during the work week and before 5:00pm. Oh, and ask for Malka. She is s-t-r-0-n-g.

You need a pick me up

It is really hard to see a friend get attacked. Whether they're outright attacks or snide comments, it's difficult to just sit back and watch (or read.) Ladies, you know how good we are at it. For example, "Mary Jane is such a sweet girl... unlike some people." Or the handy-dandy backhanded compliments, "Your dress looks great! I bet you'll be able to fit in that comfortably in no time."

Even though I'm not in the mix, I've read my fair share and have read it all silently. So I guess that makes me part of it just because this person is my friend. Tel and I have talked recently and she's had some strong feelings and opinions but nothing she couldn't handle. However, I know that my friend is now hurt, angry and upset. So I'm not going to be silent. I'm going to write about what I told her she should do which is concentrate on the positive.

Most of our egos are a tad fragile. Ninety-nine people can say how wonderful we are but that one person who says, "You're not that great" (or worse) can really do a number on our self-esteem. Well, I'm going to be one of those ninety-nine and SCREAM IT FROM THE ROOF TOPS!!!

I met Tel in the beginning of 2001 when my life was drastically changing. At the time, I was going through an UGLY break up and making my transition into the "real world." Tel welcomed me with open arms into her life. She listened to my tirades and frustrations with dating as we sunbathed, ate cheese and smoked cigarettes. She introduced me to all her friends, invited me to her short-lived Book Club, and asked if I wanted to go with her to the infamous Cow. Relatively new to the Bay Area, Tel knew what it was like to want to meet new people and the need to surround yourself with good friends. My ex-boyfriend was my social life for the longest time - I was starting anew. Without a second thought, she included me in her circle. Six years later, we're still friends.

Tel and I have different personalities. Until recently, she would say things that would just make my jaw drop. Her "shock value" may have worn off on me but she still makes me laugh. Tel tells me about places I've never heard of and wouldn't even begin to know where to find them! I'll leave it at that. She's outrageous, outgoing, outspoken and outstanding. Tel knows, while I'm neither shy or quiet (thus my appeal!), I am on the reserved side. She respects that and doesn't try to question or change me. I think our differences make for good conversation. Plus, how can I not love a girl who likes spas, wine and hula shows? Impossible.

We're still friends because of various reasons. One, she makes the effort. I'm infamous for losing touch with people because if I have to do all the work ... I'm done. She sends me random e-mails or calls me spontaneously so we can schedule a dinner, drinks or a spa treatment :) Tel's also the one who brought me into the lovely world of blogging. Two, she helps put color in my world. Some may disagree but it's important to me that I bring happiness to the people in my life. I want to be a person that makes someone's life brighter. I write "some may disagree" because people might say that creating your own happiness is more important. I think putting color in other people's lives as well as your own is equally important. Maybe that's the philanthropic side of me :) Anyway, that's what I look for in friends and Tel does this. Her outrageousness (and I say that lovingly,) fun personality, and sweet disposition is what attracted me to her as with all my other friends. Am I calling Tel a ray of sunshine? Damn straight.

Tel, you are a wonderful person. When I first saw you at our Treasure Island bus stop (can you tell it's going to get romantic?) I was a senior in college, wearing my backpack, and going to my internship. I thought you looked so confident. Seriously. Your make up ... impeccable. Your hair and clothes ... polished and professional. The cautious social butterfly that I am, (we also had crackheads on our Island, people) I waited until we saw each other a few times before I tried to strike up a conversation. For all I knew, you were going to think I was this immature student not worth a dime of your time. But no. In fact, our first words has got to be the funniest exchange I've ever had with a friend.
Me: "Um, excuse me, are you from SF State?"
Tel: "Excuse me?"
Me: "I said, are you from SF State?"
Tel: "Ohhh! No, I'm not."
(I would later find out that she was two seconds from kickin' my as$ because she thought I asked, "Are you section 8?" I told you people, we were living amongst crackheads.) From there, our friendship blossomed.

I am so happy you found "the one." I am so excited to have a reason to go to Hawaii in 2007!!! You are a great person with a great heart. Move forward, plan that wedding, have fun with P while you're doing it and for crap's sake ... smile!!

Knit happens ... all over the place

Work has been buckwild busy because I had a huge event to plan. Now it is DONE. There were 170+ people, assigned seats, a program, print materials, ... and it was a morning event, to boot. I woke up at 4:30am and started the ball rolling at 6:00am. After all was said and done, I told my boss I needed a long lunch. I then called my favorite nail salon and booked a manicure + deluxe pedicure. This was a first for me. I like to self-indulge but I could never justify two people pampering m'feet and hands at the same time. But now I can. After working six hours and it being only 12:0opm, it was well worth the small splurge. (Did I mention I had to go in to work the very next day, a SATURDAY, and work for five hours?!?! Ugh.)

Earlier in the week, my little knitting group planned an outing to my favorite yarn store, Nine Rubies, and I am 100% sure that this is a perfect place for me. Not only is it a beautiful store (it used to be a small art gallery,) but the proprietors are friendly, they stay open late for small groups, and they are hospitable, too! When my friend and I walked in the door, the lovely owners had little treats for us - strawberries, pretzels, butter cookies and a cooler of sodas and bottled water. But wait, oh my!

Is that ... wine??? Seriously? You're going to give me alcohol ... after work? Well, OF COURSE I'm going to buy stuff from you! Size 19 needles? OK, why not?! A membership? OK, I'll buy a membership! Did I tell you how much I love your store? And even though I'm sober now, I don't regret my purchases at all. Any place willing to freely pour me wine and serve me little treats deserves my loyalty and hard earned money. I love my Nine Rubies somethin' fierce!

Here are my quiz results, Sister. I'm no knitting guru (and that is why I bow to you) but I was pretty excited to score a drawing of a brown girl. Sweet.
Humph. My hair is still bigger than hers.

You appear to be a Knitting Adventurer. You are through those knitting growing pains and feeling more adventurous. You can follow a standard pattern if it's not too complicated and know where to go to get help. Maybe you've started to experiment with different fibers and you might be eyeing a book with a cool technique you've never tried. Perhaps you prefer to stick to other people's patterns but you are trying to challenge yourself more. Regardless of your preference, you are continually trying to grow as a knitter, and as well you should since your non-knitting friends are probably dropping some serious hints, these days.

What Kind of Knitter Are You?

Scratch, my as$

I'm all for making stuff from scratch. (Remember when I baked drunk? Coconut crunch cookies ... from scratch!)

But there are certain foods that I will always "add 1 cup of water and mix." How can you beat that??? I just made these muffins last night. Sure, they have a bunch of sugar but whatever, they taste good.

I like boxed mashed potatoes, too. I don't care what anyone says.

And I'm not even PMS-ing

"Life choices." That is such a buzz word at the J-O-B. So I question a few of my own. Don't confuse the following self-evaluation as regrets or what-ifs. It's just stuff I've wondered about and, while I don't question the outcomes, I wonder about the swiftness (or not) of my actions.

Not sure if it's the change in my meds but even The Man says I'm more serious about stuff and he wishes I was my playful self again. (OK, the only true meds I take are BC. I take vitamins, though, and maybe I need to hit the Flinstones bottle again.) I'm hoping that if I write down some of the stuff that's been floating in my head then it would be out and I could be my more normal self. Perhaps writing it down will be like fiber for my brain and I can end my psychological constipation and take a mental poop. A huge apology to my psych friends for the poor, grotesque and crass comparison ;)

Career - Very few people I know have had as many internships as me. I had a buttload between undergrad and grad school:
1. on-campus social service agency (Unfortunately, it wasn't b/c I wanted to be this awesome world-changer. I needed the units and wasn't able to crash the classes I wanted)
2. high-tech PR firm (didn't like it and it eventually went belly up after the Dot-Bomb)
3. radio station (for free! I interned for free! :( It was OK but not what I wanted to do and I had to work another job so I would at least break even)
4. television station (liked it)
5. event management company (didn't like it at all. I find it to be thankless but I highly respect the folks who do this. I definitely enjoy attending an event rather than planning.)
6. Another television station (again, for free!!! But I had a great experience.)
These internships were often in addition to a job and I did work at a TV station for a year after I graduated.
Obviously, these were all trial and error. I figured out many times over what I did NOT want as a career. But it was and still is difficult to figure out what I want to be. I've been struggling with the thought that it is possible to have a job that I'm in love with and passionate about or is a job a career that I like just enough and its only purpose is to fund the things that bring me joy - traveling, hobbies, having fun with my friends, and taking care of my family.
Somehow, I ended up back at a social service agency. Crazy, right? Who woulda thunk it. And I don't regret it for a minute. I love the people at my work. But I don't know if it's where I'm meant to be. I'm really torn about this right now. Luckily, I've been able to express this to my boss and am currently trying to figure out where I can grow in the organization and if there's a place for me. So that's a big fat "to be continued."

Love - no, not The Man (I can just imagine the e-mails and phone calls of "What the hell happened???") More like who I am when I'm in a relationship and do I like myself when I'm part of a couple. So yes, this is all about me:P For the most part, I do. I learned A LOT about myself from the previous one. I was very immature then. I didn't believe in compromise, I threw tantrums, I wanted to change him into someone else. Now don't get me wrong, despite all this, I was still a dandy girlfriend. I was 17 years old, for crap's sake! (And for me to sing my own praises, I'd have to put the Ex on blast and there's really no need for that. Just know we clearly were not meant to be.) After that relationship was over, I knew that I didn't want to be THAT girl again. What do I mean? I would have to take the next guy "as is." No man-project, no trying to change someone. Because I didn't want anyone to try to change ME. That's right, people, I come "as is" too.
I have learned to compromise, keep my tantrums at bay, to have patience (that's a new one) and am still working on some other stuff. I am guilty of making the love of my life my entire life. Not because he asked me to but I just did it. I've put that person ahead of my friends, family, school and/or work. Bad girl!! That's something I continually work out in my head. I've gotten better at having balance in my life.
It's also hard for me to distinguish the different between compromise and settling. If you can't tell already, I have stubborn tendencies. I know this so I work on it. (I don't want to be anyone else's project but I believe in making myself better and being my own "work-in-progress.") When do you know that you've crossed that line of compromise and ended up in the world of settling? I'm always getting ticked off at myself for that because that line is fuzzy, if not invisible, to me. Like most women, I was brought up to be an independent woman [insert Destiny's Child song] and not to put up with any $hit. However, when being part of a relationship, there is a certain amount of "$hit" one deals with because, whether you like it not, they are putting up with yours!
No one want to be taking advantage of and that's what happens when you go into the world of settling. Have I confused you yet? I fear that I'm the only one that wonders about this one. I know The Man deals with this too even though he doesn't come out and say it. From time to time, we express our frustration, happiness, likes and dislikes. But not a lot. And I am A-OK with that because you can only talk about your relationship so much (we don't want to be THAT couple.)

I'm sure there's more tucked away but being stone serious isn't something I like to do for a long period of time. My head feels a little lighter now, in a good way. Nothing like a good brain dump to ease the mind.

See what you did, Pookie?? You went and put up that picture of how a chick's brain works and I got all mushy and crapped out an emotional post ;)

I promised to explain

A follow up to my "Mabuhay y'all!" post.

1. "My hair is too long for bucket showers" - The bucket shower, better known as "Tabu"(sounds like "tah'-boh'") is where you use a large bucket and a smaller bucket to bathe. What you do is put hot water in the bucket, add the cold water until the temperature is right for you, and use the smaller bucket to scoop out the water and dump it on you to wet yourself / rinse off soap / rinse out shampoo. In my experience, hot water is not usually available. You would think that the humidity and heat would make a cold bucket shower refreshing. Unfortunately, it's more shocking to the body than anything else. Check out this blog if you need "tabu"clarification. (No affiliation with the writer, just thought it was a good explanation.)

If you've seen my head of [huge] hair, you know that it will take buckets and buckets (and more buckets) to wash my hair. I must shampoo twice and then condition. Since tabu showers cause lots of splashing, which leads to small and big pools of still water, the 'skeeters are almost always near by just waiting to use my body as a buffet table.

Many if not most places in the Philippines have the typical American showers. But there are still a few places, even remote resorts, that haven't caught up to the craze called, "shower heads."

2. "I'm about 10-15 lbs too heavy for my relatives' comfort" - When I was 19 years old, I took a trip to the Philippines. I had a lot going on in my life at that time and wasn't dealing to well with it. I was about 12 lbs lighter and a size 2/3 from eating a lot less and taking up smoking. (Just so you get the picture, before I left for vacation, one of my college friends asked me if I was taking drugs because I had dropped so much weight.)

Upon my arrival, a relative said, "You look good! It's good to be curvy." An uncle told me later that my body was good for childbirthing and it's OK that I wasn't skinny.

Last time I went I was probably the size that I am now - 5/6. I was flat out called "fat." One of the more rude ones said, "You're so pretty but why are you so fat?" What am I supposed to say to that? I know, sounds terrible but my relatives* are so frank with each other that when I came back to the US, I was comfortable being "fat" and had made peace with it.


*Don't think that all my relatives are a$sholes. A few of them are too blunt but the rest of them are so sweet. They always ask when I'm going to visit and are super sweet to me when I finally get there. It's just two or three that need one of my Uggs up their a$s. The majority of my relatives are extremely hospitable and are very very loving. I can't wait to see them :)

I have to add that my parents and sister have never made me feel bad about my weight or even mention it in a negative way.

Mabuhay y'all!

It's true - I'm going to the Philippines!

Now, a few of you might think, "What's the big deal? You're Filipino. You should be going to your Motherland." Here's the thing - I am 100% American, too. The whole identity or labeling thing has the potential to be a whole other long a$$ entry but just know there is a difference between being Filipino and Filipino American. Obviously, I fall under the latter.

What does that mean? Well, you can't really generalize Filipino Americans (FA) either b/c we're all different. And just like the US, the Philippines has different regions and provinces so each FA could quite possibly have a very different background from the next. For instance, like a kid from Hollywood vs. a kid from the Bronx vs a kid from Waco. Different.

Here are some of my obstacles -
1. I am extremely uncomfortable in 90+ degree weather. Sleeping is damn near impossible.
2. I speak Filipino food only.
3. My hair is too long for bucket showers. Again, this would be a whole new blog entry but I'll get to it, I promise.
4. I'm about 10-15 lbs too heavy for my relatives' comfort (you bet your sweet a$s that's going to be another blog entry.)
5. I am irregular when I travel. This probably makes me the most sad. Not a damn thing to do with being FA, it just makes traveling difficult.

Despite these obstacles, I'm very excited to be going. I've been to the Philippines a few times and know how to make it fun. Trial and error right? Here are my plans for my vacation in a few months -
1. Two weeks max. A lot of people say that two weeks is too short. That I would need to stay at least three weeks to get my money's worth. Believe you me, two weeks is long enough for me to stay anywhere. Don't judge me! That's just how it is.
2. My own room. Heaven bless my parents. They are so sweet. But one hotel room is NOT big enough for me, my dad and AL. Not when I was 17, not when I was 21 and certainly not now. But since I'm gainfully employed, I can spring for my own room. This prevents a war being waged between AL and AL Junior. Yes, I absolutely admit that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
3. Spa-ing in a third world country. Don't know if it's a Filipino thing but AL has never been into spa treatments. I didn't really get into spas until the past year. Well, guess what?? The Philippines has many many resorts where people from Australia, America, Japan and Hawaii vacation (don't ask me, they just do.) It's still a tad pricey but less expensive than American spas. And they are top notch because of their clientele. That's right, BIG PIMPIN' on a small budget.

Well, I'm pretty sure this question is in vain b/c I know my peeps. Got any suggestions for my PI trip? I'm open to them.

Oh, did I mention that I will be meeting The Man's side of the family my second week? Please, enlighten me: Why are female relatives SO protective of their male family members? Brothers, uncles, cousins, nephews. I kid you not when I say I'm a little bit skahred to meet his family. I'll ask you to wish me luck when my vacation draws nearer.

My friends kick a$s

I LOVE Grey's Anatomy. I love it so much that a coworker/friend left me a voicemail message over the weekend saying Grey's Anatomy Season One was on sale at Target.

Well, last week, I helped another coworker/friend take care of 24 kids for Valentine's Day. When the night was over, I told her that my ovaries shrunk into little raisins and that I sewed up my vagina when I went to the bathroom. She said I took friendship to a whole new level ;) As a thank you gift, she bought me this and gave it to me yesterday.

I am sooooooo happy. I am one of those people that will watch the DVD, then watch the outtakes, then rewatch the DVD with commentary and then watch the bonus material. Maybe not all at once but I am very thorough when I love my show/movie.

*Bet you thought my application (see Pookiepie's blog comments) was in vain. I think not. I've got bomb a$s friends. Fo'reel tho.

Three day weekend, anyone?

The Man is union. The Man gets a four day weekend.

I get squat. That's right. I'm going to work on Friday AND Monday. Think that's the pits? On Monday, I have a 7:30am meeting and a 6:00pm meeting so it's not like I can sleep in or leave work early. I'm going to end up working a 12-hour day. SON OF A BISCUIT!

Because it's only RIGHT but doesn't even began to make up for my NO-three-day-weekend, I will be getting a pedicure at my favorite nail salon for lunch tomorrow. In no way does my pedicure take away the injustice of working on Monday but at least I will have cute toes. Damn straight.

No one likes an ugly bridesmaid dress

My friend, Maria, was kind enough to ask me to be in her wedding. So this October, I will be going to Oahu. There's something to be said about my annual tropical tradition. See? It's fate! Hawaii beckons me. And you didn't believe me.

Bless Maria's heart, she wants us to be in comfortable bridesmaid dresses. She's decided on a short, cotton, black version of her wedding dress available on JCrew. Yes, friends, that means I won't be wearing some WHACK A$S size that they ("they" being the sadistic wedding dress makers) conjure up which, in turn, makes women subject themselves to cabbage soup only diets and a pack of cigarettes for every meal until the big day. Freakin' SOBs.

This is what she's thinking about having us wear -

Praise be, she is actually considering dresses we can wear again! It's a sunset/evening wedding and the guys will be all in tuxes so Maria figures it's best to have us in short black cotton dresses. Throw some flowers in my hair and I am good to go! Best of all, it's $98 minus tax and S&H. I could kiss her.

Yah for not having a Bridezilla as a friend. Phew!
And just when you thought I couldn't get more little old lady-ish ...
I have found my new favorite yarn store, Nine Rubies. That's right, folks! I'm completely unapologetic - I am going to talk about a yarn store.
Nine Rubies is less than ten minutes away from my work. Danger, danger! But it's the first yarn store I've been in that is beautiful yet completely unpretentious. The mother/daughter duo are pretty awesome and give spectacular customer service. Plus, how can I NOT like a place this pretty?

I know, I know. I'm a disappointment to all those that have known me as the gal with the inscripted flask, "Who's Your Daddy?" Well, maybe they'll allow me to have it at the next Knit Happens meeting. Wouldn't that be ironic*?

*Knitting drunk is very, very bad. It's as bad as, if not worse than, blogging drunk. Yarn can be very expensive and fixing f-ed up projects could be even more expensive, costing me my sanity. If I were to bring said flask, I would have to cease all projects for the evening. Eh, I could deal ;)

My back ache, my butt too tight, my hips shake from left to right ...

Haven't been blogging lately because work has been pretty stressful. Because I don't want to LOSE my job over something so silly as me writing about my job, I'll just say that it's been keeping me busy.

Thanks for being understanding!

Quick clothing update

How did I handle my business? Or a better question would be, "How did I spend my Superbowl Sunday?"

I went to the Gilroy Premium Outlets and marched my happy a$s to the Ann Taylor Factory. I LOVE this store!! I did not dress very snazzy (aka I looked tore up) but I got the best customer service. Three women helped me out. No lie.

Why Ann Taylor Factory is the bomb:
1. awesome customer service.
2. suits that fit. Well, evidently my size ranges. One pants suit is size 6 petite pants and size 6 regular blazer while my other pants suit is a size 4 pants and a size 8 petite blazer. That's right. I'm a size 4 to 8. How random is that???
3. Each pants suit was $119

That's right. $119 each. I also opened up a credit card account, advised by Karaway, and got an additional 10% off. I look forward to the future coupons that Miss K promised I would receive. Despite my many sizes, Ann Taylor has very nice clothes and bless them for having a Factory store! Between that and their Loft, I'm going to actually look like a big girl.

*Because I don't want to fully insulate my bedroom with my wardrobe, I did give a bag full of tanks, sweaters and pants to a teen program in a coastal housing project community. Ahhhhh, nothing like a good clothing cleansing.

Funny Moment(s) #5

My work started a knitting club to help us become more community-oriented. (Yes, I had a hand in it's inception and no, you didn't read my profile wrong. I am not 72 but, in fact, truly 27.) Whatever. I really like to knit and would like to be better. Don't make me kick your a$s.

Tonight, we were a mix of coworkers and clients. We were so diverse in ages! I did the introductions and found out that our youngest member was 8 years old but I didn't dare ask who was the oldest ;) Anyhoo, remember Maria and Suzy? (Click here to refresh your memory.) That's right, they joined the knitting group too. I'm sure you understand that no good can come out of our mouths when the three of us are together.

In the midst of respectable older ladies and far far away from our little youngster, we were muttering inappropriate things to each other.

Suzy, learning how to knit for the very first time: "I'm knitting a muff muppet."

Me, who forgot all her stuff at home and borrowed Maria's needles and red yarn: "I'm knitting you a tampon cozy."

Maria, always quick in response: "For the new or bloody ones?"

But my favorite moment? When Suzy found out that not only did I NOT have cable but I was barbaric enough to still use dial-up. Suzy screeched, "Are you kidding me?! My kids eat Top Ramen so I can have Comcast!"

Funny $hit, man. I love my coworkers.

Handlin' my bidness

It's time for me to dress like a grown up. At least, during the weekdays.

Mind you, I'm petite, broad-shouldered and have a medium built ( a lil' curvy.) Suits tend to make me look boxy. Nothing too expensive but I'll spend a bit so the pant or skirt suits don't look cheap. I just need to add some suits to my wardrobe.

Anyone have any ideas where I should buy my big girl clothes?

The story about Butter

Picture it, San Francisco, Mary Ward Hall, 1999 ....

I was living in the dorms my first year at SFSU. My roommate, Meghan, was also a junior and we lived on a floor that was not only co-ed but mixed with freshmen, sophomores and juniors.

Our room looked a like this, except with a much narrower space between the beds. No, our dorm was not this spacious but the set up was the same:


Our furniture wasn't quite as classy as this, though.

So, imagine that there was half as much walking space between the two beds and definitely no room for a night stand. That was my dorm room. Our beds also folded in so they served as couches during the day. If you've ever lived in the dorms, you probably know that people prop their doors open during the day so people know that you're in and available to socialize.

I was sitting on my bed (left) and my roommate was sitting at her desk (right.) Our dormmate, Kelly, walked in. Kelly, a little socially inept, just plopped right down on Meghan's bed without asking and was probably telling me about her terrible day at work or class. I don't remember. All I know is that Meghan got up from her desk and had to squeeze between the beds and us in order to get to her closet. As she walked by, Kelly said to us, "Do you smell that?"

Meghan, at her closet, sniffed the room. "No."

I sniffed the air. "You mean the buttered popcorn? I think someone's popping popcorn."

Kelly looked at Meghan and said, "Are you on your period?"

Meghan, not sure if this was a joke, asked "No, why?"

Kelly, dead serious, "When you walked by, I smelled period."

I thought Meghan was pretty nice not to smack Kelly. I mean, Kelly was sitting on her bed as she insulted her. Seven years later, I still vividly remember this incident.

I recently told my coworkers about this and, sometimes, we ask each other if we have buttered popcorn.

And that is the story of "butter."

Thursday is my Friday

Tomorrow is the last Friday I get the day off. *sigh*

Today is my friend's birthday. Maria is my partner in crime at work. She is the person who provokes me to whisper obscenities when no one can hear us. She also challenges me to creatively find different ways to say vagina. I gave her a birthday card this morning, telling her that she is a wonderful friend, talented, smart, and all that good stuff. Then I ended with:

PS: Bearded clams rule. But stinky, buttery* ones do not.

Today, I also visited Tel. I was in the city for a meeting and it when it was over, I was smackdab in the middle of rush hour. So I dropped by and she made me hot chocolate (thanks!) We chatted for a bit and then she went to the gym while I finished my hour commute. Before I left, Tel also gave me some fine literature to take home:

Friendship is a beautiful thing.

*Next entry, I will share the "buttery" reference.

What's in a name?

I keep changing my mind about this one.

The Man and I, while not close to getting married, talk comfortably about what life would be like, how we would be, yadda yadda yadda. These topics never stir up a serious conversation and we usually end up laughing. Then the married name vs. maiden name came up.

When we first talked about it, I didn't mind. Much. I told him, if he really wanted it, of course I would take his last name. But please know that this is a big sacrifice to me because I LOVE my last name. I'm very proud of it. But if it was so important to him, what the heck? I'd change it. After all, don't almost all women?

Stupid, stupid me. I should have given my opinion more thought because I misled The Man in thinking that I didn't have a problem with this identity change. What made me really give it a second thought? I ran into my old coworker, Monica Lam.

Monica is about 20 years older than me. She was telling me all about her kids and then gave me her teenage son's newest school picture. I asked her to write his name in the back (b/c I'm terrible with names) and she wrote 'Mike Shultzlam.' I must have looked confused. "Oh," she said, "my son has a different last name than me. Actually, we all have different last names. My husband's last name is Shultz, mine is Lam, and we decided to give the kids Shultzlam."

As she's telling me this, I have a few thoughts. Don't the kids get confused? Doesn't the whole last name cause a fiasco when traveling or even just trying to straighten all that out with their schools? I end up asking her, "You didn't take your husband's last name? I know more women do it now but wasn't it unheard of when you got married?" Monica responded, "Why should I change my name? I told my husband, "you can change your last name to Lam but I'm not changing mine to Shultz!" and he understood. It's my name, I should be able to keep it if that's what I want."

If you know me, as most of you do, I'm sure you know I'm thinking, "Yah! Damn straight! Why do I have to change my name??!!"Woe is The Man. I know he doesn't see it as marking his territory. He just wants to proudly introduce his wife as "Mrs. R@mirez." Just a way of giving a little something of himself to his wife.

But I mean it, I LOVE my last name. My father has taught me a lot about my family, the culture (particularly the province he is from in the Philippines) and I love that my last name keeps me literally tied to all of that history. The Man understands. This is exactly why he loves his last name. He is so proud and has stated on many different occasions that he would want his wife to take his name. And I never had a real problem with it. Until I talked to Monica. She made me realize how connected I am to my last name and that I really don't want to part with it.

I half teasingly ask The Man if I could hyphenate my last name. This would mean thatif we were to marry, my last name would be seven syllables and 19 letters long. Yahhh, I'm going to have to pass on that one. So I asked him this weekend if he would mind if I didn't change my last name. I don't know if he thought I was being serious but he said, "As long as the children have my last name." I'm a bit afraid that if he knew I was serious, his feelings would be hurt.

So, what's in a name? I guess I won't worry about this until it's time for me to worry. Until then, I'll blissfully go on being an "@duviso."

Birth control pills can only help so much

I went to my alma mater today. I made a purchase at the campus bookstore and guess what was in each plastic bag? A pamphlet for Proactiv Solution!

What are they trying to say?! (Well, as someone who broke out a lot in college, I suppose this marketing plan is pretty smart. Cheese pizzas, beers and cramming 'til 4am doesn't really help a person's complexion.)

But it's not even a sample, it's just a pamphlet. Hmm, since SFSU is so liberal, I wonder if the kids are going to make a big stink about it and force the bookstore to remove the pamphlets. (You would be surprised what fires them up.)

Anyhow, I don't have anything to blog about. I was just tired of seeing my previous entry title every time I accessed my blog. Yes, those words come out of my mouth but it's quite different to repeatedly read it. I mean, I am a lady. Most of the time.

"Her pants are so tight, I can see her clit."

That, my friends, is the kind of stuff that is said at work.

No, no, no, not in front of customers or my boss (well, unless she's in a good mood.) These conversations are said behind closed doors, way in the back of the building where our offices are hidden.

There are three or four of us that try to out-gross each other. Of course, still respecting each other's bounderies. For instance, I get queasy talking about feces or getting too detailed about the bunghole. But for whatever reason, I am A-OK talking about vaginas and penises. Odd, isn't it?

Here's an example of a conversation from last week. Keep in mind, this is while we work. Usually when we're doing our menial tasks like printing and copying. (Working at a non profit means you make speeches at public forums, develop PR materials, ask wealthy companies and individuals for money, and by golly, you're still not too good to cut paper and stuff envelopes. But, over all, I like my job and don't mind this part. Much.)

Me: "Hey, did I ever tell you guys that I never heard of the word, "twat" until my boyfriend told me?"

Suzy: "Whaa?? You just learned the word, "twat?!""

Me: "Well, three years ago! But yes, the word is fairly new to me."

Maria to Suzy: "Hey! Have you heard "bearded clam?" We just learned that one last night." This is from the same guy who taught us deep throat protein blast.

Me: "Stinky bearded clam!" That's right folks, I'm 27 years old and a college graduate.

Suzy, giggling: "That's my husband's favorite term! I'm going to tell him you guys just learned it."

A few minutes later, talking about another topic ...

Suzy: "Maria, are you going to Europe this year?" Sigh. "I've never been to Europe. I'm so jealous."

Maria: "Awww, you can still go! Why don't you go this year?"

Suzy: "Yah, right. Two kids, a husband ..." Turns to me. "Trust me when I tell you - don't get married. Travel. Then travel some more. Just wait before you get hitched!"

Maria, laughing: "Oh, that's right! You haven't heard Sue go off about getting married too early. I told her she should hold a workshop here at work to all the women in their 20s."

Me: "Hey, you know what you can call it? "Lock The Twat!" I'll even make you flyers."

Snort, snort, giggle, giggle.

We are exempt staff, living on a shoestring budget, and working our as$es off 40-60 hours a week. Sources of amusement are scarce. We are forced to make our own.

Sister diagnosed me with OCD

... and since I don't want to pay a professional $100-$500 (depending on how many sessions it would take to diagnose me) I'm just going to believe her.

Here's the problem - I'm scared to have a party or a large group of people over. OK, more than one person at a time. Yes that's large to me! I live on my own ( although The Man is a part-time roommate) and cannot stand to clean someone else's "stuff" in the bathroom. I mentioned this in passing in an old blog entry - that other's people hair and "stuff" grosses me out. I'm talking about this b/c I cleaned today. I vacuumed, dusted, scrubbed the floors and cleaned my two bathrooms.

This is where I'm going to get a bit more specific. Only a couple of people use my bathroom besides me. Both men. I almost gagged when I cleaned the toilet. Under the rim was very dirty. (Wasn't aware of this until I started scrubbing and "stuff" came falling down.) OK, I'm warning you, this is TMI - I know for a fact that my "stuff" doesn't cause shrapnel. That's just how I was made, OK?! So I'm grossed out b/c I'm cleaning someone else's "stuff." And then, in the other bathroom, there are pee sprinkles on the rim. Not as gross but still! (I don't get it. The toilet hole is HUGE. How do you STILL hit the damn rim and sometimes, the floor??? Yes, men, I'm talking to you! Fortunately, I think only one man reads this blog so, Cousin, I'm sorry to shout out your gender but for crap's sake!)

I can only imagine what my bathrooms would look like after a party or having a group of people over for a few days. This truly SCARES me. I shared this fear with my Sister, Demondoll, and she said, "I think you have OCD." So then I told her, I want friends to come over and I want them to be comfortable. More importantly, I want to keep them as friends after their stay instead of what I think could happen which is me not wanting to talk to them for a month b/c I had to clean their funk. So Sister suggested that I have a "Housekeeping tips" sheet in my guest room. It will help spell out my home's quirks as well as my own. It's going to look something like this-

LULU'S HOUSEKEEPING TIPS

Welcome! I'm so glad you'll be staying with me. Here are some things you should know to make your stay more comfortable:
1. Food - My fridge is your fridge! Crack open Big Martha when you need a bite.
2. Courtesy flushes - For whatever reason, the plumbing is weak. If you're going to be on the seat for a while, I strongly recommend that you flush intermittently. (If this procedure fails you, the plunger is in the garage.)
3. Heat - It get chilly! You determine which is more important, warmth or privacy. If you choose heat, keep your bedroom door open.
4. Showers - please keep your bathroom door open and just lock your bedroom door. It's an old house and there is no fan to prevent dampness.
5. Clorox wipes - conveniently located in your bathroom! The housekeeper gets very queasy when it comes to "shrapnel" in, on, and around the toilet. So please use them. (By "housekeeper," I mean me.)

I'm hoping that this will help my guests work around my OCD. If all else fails and they leave my bathroom wronger than wrong, I will pay someone to clean my bathroom. And then mail my guests the bill. Just kidding. But I'm not sure if I will talk to them for a month or so. Hey, I have to be honest! I have a weak stomach to the dismay of (1) my microbiologist mom who has to deal with ALL types of human excretion (2) my manly father who is not scared of but laughs in the face of dirt, grime, and grossness and (3) The Man, also quite manly, who has to deal with all sorts of nastiness on a construction site.

Don't misunderstand me, I am not a neat freak! It takes me forever to get into the cleaning mode (usually once a month.) I leave papers everywhere. I shed my long hair everywhere. It's just bathroom "stuff" that freak me out. Even when I had roommates! Once, after a party, I bribed my three roommates by agreeing to clean the living room and kitchen if I didn't have to touch the bathrooms.

So there you have it, confessions of a person with OCD. Maybe.

----------------------------------------------

Jan 17th, 2006, 9:58pm: Oh boy! The Man has his manties in a twist. I confessed that I mentioned him. He protested and said I failed to mention that I leave snot rags all over the place. It's true! *Sob* It's true. He wants me tell you about the time he stepped in a pile of fresh snot rags (I was sick!) And another time, he pried it out of my hands when I fell asleep holding one. In his words, I was "...clutching it for dear life."

There you go, my love, I laid out my imperfections just for you!

Lulu, where you at?

I had to work last Sunday and will have to work the next two coming up. But I don't mind because I get three Fridays off!! It's so nice. Even though I'm working five days, it feels like I'm being naughty and cutting work. I can run errands and it's not nearly as crowded as it is on the weekend. I get to catch up on my favorite weekday shows that I normally don't get to see (Starting Over is getting a little bit much for me but I adore Kelly on Regis & Kelly!)

As I sit in one of them, I decided to write about...

LULU'S FAVORITE PLACES

E-On Cafe. Not only does place hook you up with free high speed wireless connection, but they have delicious lattes and sandwiches. And even when I didn't bring my laptop b/c I brought The Man instead, I still enjoy the place. Although I want it to be successful (it's fairly new) I fear that it will become crazy crowded. But until then, I will trek out in the rain or on a day off and enjoy my local cafe. It's also the place I end up viewing Karaway's oh-so-colorful media clips. Crazy girl :)

Pinkies Nail Salon. YES, I have girlie tendencies! I don't have acrylic nails (I'm not a hater I'm just stating the truth) but I love a good pedicure. And I used to have to shlep my a$s to the city - a good 45 minutes away!- to get a nice pedi. Why? I don't ask for much. I just want my nail salon to be a clean place where I can relax and not worry about getting some crazy foot infection from lack of good hygeine practies. (There was this huge news story in San Jose about nail salons spreading bacteria from their foot spas. Ew.)
Anyhow, this place bring me so much joy. I can't even begin to tell you. Not only do they have massage chairs but the manicurists (well, my favorite two) give BOMB A$S foot massages. For a few more bucks, they will give you a 10-minute foot massage. I indulge in this when I'm super stressed out. Pinkies is super cute, clean, trendy and affordable. I love, love, love this place.

Bean Street Cafe. (OK, this picture and the web link is actually the owners' other coffee shop but I couldn't find a picture of Bean Street. Whatever, it looks similar, dammit.) You are going to think I'm such a hippie but I love to go to this cafe after power yoga. Yah, yah, yah, green tea's great for me, choke full of antioxidants, lowers my blood pressure and ends world hunger. But if I want to be a pleasant person contributing positively to society, my bum desparately needs a latte. The Greek owners are so cute and sweet. My N0-Fun latte (non fat sugar free vanilla latte) is delicious here. Unless they have a newbie worker. Then I have to add a lot of cinnamon and give them three weeks to get better.

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OK, so I seriously thought about including my favorite yarn store but I think people would boycott my blog from boredom. I would have included my hair salon that I've been with for seven years but (1) they don't have a Web site and (2) I love my hair salon most out of all my favorite places. While I don't believe that my blog has any significant power or influence, if I posted about them and then they didn't have the time to book me for hair appointments, I would have to drop kick some a$s. I've been with my hair stylist longer than my boyfriend. Before her, I was a victim of jacked up haircuts and dim-witted hair stylists (For crap's sake, my hair is straight. Yet I've somehow been lucky enough to encounter many a hair flunkies who seem utterly confused by straight hair. WTF?)

I also used to have favorite bars and nightclubs but those days are over. Thus, the yarn store. So, from your Suburban gal, here are a few of my favorite places.

My new favorite scarf

The Alpha Lion, also known as my mom, made me a dope ass scarf. Seriously, it's beautiful.

See, AL made Demondoll a scarf for her birthday and I LOVED it. So AL said if I bought the yarn (she knows I can be particular:) she would make it for me. Since D-Doll lives in the snowy wilderness, she has a thicker version. Because I live in sometimes hot/ sometimes cold Northern California, AL made it dainty.

Check it out:

Look at the detail. Can you believe AL crocheted this scarf??

(Click on the little pictures to get a better look.)

Just so you know, I can't crochet for the life of me. It doesn't soothe me WHAT.SO.EVER. This, of course, makes me in awe of AL's talent and I will proudly show off this scarf. As soon as I have clean laundry to wear that will do it justice. FYI: I'm wearing my velour jumpsuit tomorrow b/c I have slim pickins.

Here is a pic of AL along with my Dad and me (at the same dinner/dance.) Don't you want to hug them 'cuz they're so cute??

Nothing much to report

The eagle has landed (aka Power Week has kicked off) and I'm still eating like a football player. I'm hoping this will end soon.

But to keep you entertained, I do have a couple of pictures of The Man, me (both in Carmel,) and one of us together at a dinner/dance a couple month's back. Why? Well, why not.

I love this picture I took of him. Isn't the background awesome? The ocean is such a gorgeous backdrop.


(We are quite the squinty couple, aren't we? I mean, we are Asian. But still.)

My man in his barong. Goodness, he's so handsome.

(Obviously, I didn't take this picture so I'm not the one who cut off his hair. Nevertheless, he's still adorable.)

"No way! Is that ..."

I finally watched the movie, 40-Year-Old Virgin. Unrated version, to boot. I laughed my ass off (I had also knocked back four glasses of rum & Cherry Diet Pepsi.) I think I'll watch The Office religiously now.

But you know what freaked me out? The last scene where he finally does the deed. "What the f*uck?!" I turn to Maria, "That's my bedspread!" Maria replies, "What?" Pause. "Oh yah! I remember when you bought that." Then I squint and look at the sheets. "Holy $hit! Those are my sheets, too!" "No way," disagrees Maria, "The color is different, isn't it?" "Nope, those are my sheets."

People, my sheets AND bedspread (I only have two sets that I alternate b/c my bed has a pillow top and requires extra-deep fit pocket sheets and King size comforters) are movie stars. NO LIE. My bedspread is made of multi-colored shiny ribbon and fabric. I insist that you pull out your 40-Year-Old Virgin DVD and skip to the end. No, seriously, bust it out.

Now look at my comforter:

See?!
(I'm not using the sheets that are just like the ones in the movie or I'd fold the comforter back.)

THOSE ARE MY SHEETS AND BEDSPREAD!! Well, not mine but the exact style as mine and not common bedding! I'm still taken aback and I'm totally sober now. Humm. My bedding is famous. No autographs, please.

PS: My bedding is from Marshall's. If I bought them anywhere else, it would set me back several hundred dollars. If you also require extra-deep pocket bedding, this is the place! I think my sheets are Egyptial cotton w/ a superhigh thread count. Hey, don't knock the cheap places 'til you try 'em.

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OK, it is now 2:00pm and I realize that I was way too excited to see my bedding in a movie. Oh well, at least you know that I'm easy to please :) And "YAHHHHH!" for not waking up with a headache or a dry heaving episode! I was worried. I mean, I drank plenty of water and took vitamins but sometimes there aren't enough preventative measures in the world to combat a well-deserved hangover.

A few days before my Power Week

I'm bloated, my face is breaking out and I'm eating EVERYTHING like it's going to expire at midnight. TMI? Too damn bad. (I forgot to mention that I'm occasionally irritable.)

I dislike the week before and the first couple beginning days. Why? Because I eat until my belly feels tight and you can thump my tummy like watermelon. I break out like I'm a teenager with pimples that are large and unpopable (gross!) Worse, it's the time when I probably beat myself up the most about my looks, think of things to worry about in my relationship with The Man, get a little more sensitive and, basically, torture myself. But at least I don't have mood swings. (I went through three types of birth control pills until I was able to nip THAT in the bud.)

Anyhoo, other than pre-Power Week, I'm doing pretty well. I'm STILL trying to figure out how to post pictures that are unclickable so that I can post pictures of The Man and me from the New Year and any future pics. So if you know, let me know!

Oh! I finished "knit in the round." For knitting novices like me or knitting virgins ("Why, hellloo there, come here often?") that means knitting in a spiral instead of back and forth, like a typewriter. Typically, people knit with two straight needles. When I first started knitting, I was automatically introduced to bamboo circular needles-my favorite. So here is how it looked in the beginning:
I'm just knitting around and around, no purling necessary b/c knit in the round makes a stockinette stitch.

(If you aren't into knitting, dammit, just pretend you care and entertain me. On a similar note, it's funny to see The Man accept my knitting. Before, I think he was scared I was 26-going-on-70. But then he got smart and realized that this new found hobby leaves the remote control unprotected and up for grabs. Yes, I knit during football games, basketball games, and home improvement shows.)

This is where the $hit gets complicated. Or at least LOOKS complicated. I am now decreasing to make the crown of the hat. I have to introduce the double pointed needles (four=3 holding the stitches to make the triangle and 1 to knit the other 3 with) and remove the circular needles. I was concentrating so I didn't even think about how crazy it looked until I removed the circular needles. For crap's sake, look at it! It looks like three knitters got high and came up with a brilliant idea to knit one hat together.

So this is the inside of the hat. There was no need for a seam. The decrease is pretty fast (the pattern is from Stitch 'n Bitch) and then bam! I pull it together, tie and knit the ends.

When I use girlie colors like this, I like to tell The Man that the piece is for him. Before, I would get this look of terror from him b/c he knows how hard I work and that loving me means wearing the fu*king hat. But he's on to me now and calls my bluff. Darn.

Pretty bleepin' dope, yo.

Because I was freakin' tagged ...

Lists of 7, in no particular order.

7 Things I would love to do before I bite the big one:
1. Win the lotto
2. Parasail
3. Buy a house that I will want to live in until, well, I bite the big one
4. Be able to take care of my family so no one has to worry about finances - my folks, siblings, and any little ones I create
5. Go to Hawaii every year (or, at least, some tropical location)
6. Be in a movie - main stream, NOT XXX
7. Take thousands of vacations with The Man with no fighting :)

7 Things I can't do:
1. Surf
2. Listen to bull$hit for long periods of time
3. Swim fast (I can float and doggy paddle but that's about it)
4. Lose these last 10 lbs!! I didn't want anyone to think I was shallow in putting this in the first list so I'm going to put it here. But GD it, I'm still going to try!
5. Keep useless or deadweight friends (an irony, right?) People like that just suck out all the good energy. They also make me sad and frustrated :(
6. Tie a cherry stem with my tongue
7. Not laugh for an entire day

7 bad habits that I need to get rid of:
1. Impatience (more of a trait than a habit, yah?)
2. Eating late at night
3. Scratch my temple or forehead when I'm frustrated
4. Wanting dessert at the end of a meal
5. The intense need for "closure" - Why? I'm not always going to get it and I definitely will not always like what I hear, right?!
6. Withholding closure when I know it kills them - horrible, ain't I?;)
7. Going to bed too late

7 Favorite T.V shows/ movies of the year:
1. Grey's Anatomy
2. Veronica Mars
3. The Office
4. South Park (I know, old)
5. Sex & the City (ditto)
6. Regis & Kelly - I love Kelly!
7. Britney & Kevin's Chaotic - gotcha ;)

7 Things I say most often:
1. "Seriously?!"
2. "Shut up!"
3. "Foreel?"
4. "Snatch" (snatch fuzz, snatch hole, snatcharoo ... you get the picture)
5. "... or something like that."
6. "Bung hole"
7. "What did you say?!"

7 Things that attract me to The Man:
1. His face (I just want to give him smooches all over!)
2. His dorky humor
3. His humbleness (he only ACTS cocky ;)
4. His kindness and good manners
5. His imperfections (b/c how annoying would it be if he was perfect?!)
6. His morals and ethics
7. His good looks (not a priority, just a bonus!)

7 Randoms:
1. I sometimes make myself sick worrying about my brother
2. I truly like my job but I REALLY want to make more money
3. I really do like to surround myself with positive people because good moods rub off
4. I'm caught between wanting to be known as a kind, cute and angelic gal and an outright sex kitten. Arghhh! So I settle for neither :P
5. Different parts of my body can be very different temperatures. My legs will be lukewarm but my hands will be ice cold. So I stick my hands on The Man's neck for warmth. Hee hee, and I like the reaction. See?? I told you we do stuff like that!
6. I'm thinking about going to my ten year reunion but I'm not sure yet
7. I seriously contemplated getting a perm last year - I claim temporary insanity. Want to give me some happy pills?

If you're reading this and haven't done it yet,
YOU HAVE BEEN TAGGED! (Hey, I'm just spreading the love.)